A Case Of The Blues

I don’t really know what’s the matter with me but I’ve been waking up every morning feeling like Billy Holiday.

It’s a pity I can’t sing.

I’m experiencing a low-grade siege of sadness I can’t seem to shake. A mourning of sorts without being able to quite define its origin.

I wrote the other day about illness which may have ignited this unheralded gloom. Of all the sad events I’ve been witness to of late, I think the passing of Chester the Beagle was what may have put me over the edge.

I won’t be able to spar with his mistress about him anymore, something I really enjoyed. He was even going to be the ring bearer at my imaginary wedding. I suppose as long as it stays that way, he can still be there standing on Brooklyn Bridge with my wedding band Velcroed to his paw.

His mother, a mutual animal lover, is as ridiculous as I am, and that’s meant so well.

In the midst of my despair, no one knows better than me how blessed we are to have a sense of humor, the only thing that’s keeping my head presently out of the oven.

The other thing I’ve noticed is how my entire being, as it walks around draped in melancholy, looks for it like a miner searching for gold.

Just a few minutes ago, I watched a little kid argue with her father because she couldn’t bring her Easy Bake Oven, that was for whatever reason in the backseat of their SUV, into the restaurant they were entering. She thought it would be nice to bake something while she was in there.

She was adamant, she was relentless, she was 3.

I stood on my steps smiling at her cuteness wondering if her father was thinking what I was thinking: previews of coming attractions.

“CHAPERONE, I’M 12!”

“What do ya mean I can’t have the car? Can’t Gramma take a cab to the doctors?”

“I know he’s old enough to be you, but I love-em Daddy.”

I went into my building actually laughing as I climbed the stairs. By the time I was putting the key in the door my laughter had turned to tears.

Life is sad sometimes. I guess the trick is to look for light and beauty and those Easy Bake Ovens (that your head won’t fit into) to remind yourself it’s also incredibly wonderful.

Life lesson, no# 1,349, 62.

SB

About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
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15 Responses to A Case Of The Blues

  1. Rob says:

    You bring such joy to your readers, especially me; it doesn’t seem fair that you are so down. I wish there was something I could say to cheer you up. “I’m thinking of you” is the best that I can do.

    Like

  2. Oh, Susannah both of us can’t be sad at the same time…the world will truly fall off of it’s axis. Yesterday was a better day for me, first my son finally started to opened up about loosing Chester, so your prayers are working. Second I had a belly laugh that turned to tears, but it was a huge release of emotion and finally when I got home I opened a hand written note from the emergency doctor who cared for Chess on Saturday. The kindness of her words made us all feel better. She said she could tell Chess was a “well loved boy” which I think was a nice way of saying he was a fatty.
    You made me laugh about that little girl with the oven, she reminded me of my sister…who God graced with 2 boys for a good reason.
    Cheer up Susannah ((hugs))

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    • I’m so glad you’re feeling better. Chester had a wonderful life, no question and I don’t think he was fat, just a big boy. Your son will grow from this, loss does that. It’s the one upside. As far as my gloom goes, this too shall pass. Thanks for writing to me.

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  3. kerrycooks says:

    Hope you feel better soon Susannah – plus, I can’t sing either but that doesn’t stop me belting it out in the shower 🙂

    Like

  4. Michael says:

    You should try singing Sarah Vaughan. I know how a gloom and doom cloud can linger over one’s head. Chin up and all that rot. It’s another well crafted article. Cheers.

    Like

  5. Jed says:

    I think the necessary tool is found in the adage , “ignorance is bliss”. Regarding the sadness of this self-defeating planet, perhaps it’s best to be oblivious to much of it.
    Love, “She was adamant, she was relentless, she was 3.”

    Like

  6. jimmie chew says:

    hope things are better with you, love love love you! please feel better, we hate to hear you are sad 😦

    Like

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