Whatever you do, don’t have a cold mozzarella panini drowning in hummus before bed. I can’t imagine what I was thinking, especially being on my Amish ear diet and all.
I worked late two nights in a row so my schedule was off. I’m such a creature of habit, waking early…trolling to Starbucks at 6. When I don’t get home till almost midnight, all bodily hell breaks loose.
And to think, when they wheeled out enough Chinese food to feed Somalia I was strong enough to pass. “Oh no,” I said, while everyone else grazed at the trough, “I couldn’t possibly have that, especially at this hour.”
My culinary victory was short-lived, however, when I found half a sandwich in my purse from earlier in the day. Not that I’m supposed to have cheese either, but it was lesser of all evils so I had picked out the greens and a smidgen of mozzarella as a little midday snack.
Standing naked after a twenty minute shower washing off body make-up that had turned a sick shade of green, I stood at the sink and ate that mother as if I was going to the chair.
Which brings me to why one should opt for perhaps little lighter fare at 1 am.
I pass out like the dead the minute hitting the pillow, and at once start dreaming. Don’t know about you, but I dream in Technicolor and Dolby Sound. I mean you could film what goes through my head in the old REM stage of sleep.
I realize now you know I am properly certifiable, but it was so real that it actually got me out of bed. I turned the light on, and naturally, whatever it was or wasn’t, was gone.
I tried recollecting my dream before awakening. I was in Long Island with my friend Linda taking pictures. We were going to Central Park, but ended up at Teddy Roosevelt’s house in Oyster Bay instead. I kind of knew where that came from after just soliciting my pal Ed asking if we could go there on another day trip. Sagamore Hill, the estate’s name, used to be a working farm surrounded by lake and wildlife. So I guess, while I was there with Linda, without Ed, a deer popped in the backseat and came home with me.
It was such a real, tangible image that it stayed with me all day.
I have no explanation except to say, the next time I find as much as a cookie in my tote, it’s going right out the window…
oh deer, oh deer.