On the heels of my essay, All Shook Up… https://athingirl.com/2013/11/13/im-all-shook-up/ about my very pregnant upstairs neighbor…
that very night there was a shy knock on the door.
“Who is it?” No answer.
This is New York so I never answer unless knowing who it is.
They knock again.
“Who is it?” I then go do what any other sane, single woman in her It Happened One Night pajamas would do…I went and got my grandfather’s rolling pin I keep around just for this type of occasion.
I swing open the door like I’m about to hit a ball out to left field…when who do we have in the arms of his depleted mother but…
MILLICENT HAD THE BABY…I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!
DID I INDUCE LABOR?
There he was, all baked, like a little loaf of bread in a hat no less. And though stocky and clearly robust, she hadn’t given birth to Japan after all.
Her little body, though weary, had already snapped reasonably back. Her stomach was now wrapped in baby bunting with Levy’s Jewish Rye nestled in its folds.
I looked at this little face and thought…he already has an expression after only three days of life.
I look at the father who’s beaming like the sun and say, “Has he already a vocation? He looks like a watch salesman, or a Shriner.
As I took him into my senses like the miraculous wee being let’s face it, every baby is, he stared back at me as if to say…”Oh, you must be the crazy lady downstairs…yeah I heard about you.”
Seems my reputation has preceded me.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I’d like you to meet Mister Randolph Chin W. Kim
(He sounds like a railroad or an awfully good divorce attorney)…
soon to have his own Reality Show that yours truly, the crazy lady downstairs, plans to produce called…There Are Japs, And Then There Are Japs.
coming soon to the Asian Home Network Channel.