Milk It For What It’s Worth

I am so tired of diet advice…what’s good, what’s not good. Stay away from this, give up that.

Let me tell you something right now…

LIFE’S SHORT BABY…so I say, have that steak and second scotch. Not every night…but abstinence isn’t what it’s all cracked up to be.

George Washington never worried about cholesterol and he lived close to seven decades eating mutton no less…and that was a long life in those days.

Remember that pursuit of happiness suggestion in the Declaration of Independence? Thomas Jefferson didn’t write…but as you’re pursuing, watch those carbs.

One should not live like a monk. Monks shouldn’t live like monks, and whatever you do, don’t give up dairy.

I know, I know…what if you have food allergies or high blood pressure?

Cheat.

I’m not suggesting you eat cheese from morning till night…but for God’s sake, have that milk, 2% or otherwise, in your coffee or tea. I’ll bet Jesus drank milk all the time, if nothing more than for energy since he walked so much.

As far as it clogging your arteries, believe me, that’s not what’s doing it.

Envy, discontent…overall stress, they’re your culprits more than an occasional scoop of Ben & Jerry’s.

If I drop dead from a heart attack it won’t be because of mozzarella, it’ll be from obsessing over the future.

Someone I know who, out of the goodness of my heart will remain nameless, took it upon herself to give me a cyber lecture on the perils of dairy…milk in particular.

First of all, I like milk…been drinking it since I was a wee lass in Connecticut. I drank so much Bordens back then, Elsie could have been my mom…images-2and a good one at that. I could just see me playing in the pasture with the other calves.

images-4What’s better than a glass of milk…I know, a glass of milk with cookies.

The funny part is, I only have it in my morning coffee…light…no sugar.

And no, I don’t drink skim since it tastes like water with a slight kick. I don’t know about you, but I need more than that when I get up.

To be a wise ass, I wrote back to my friend…if I can’t have milk in the morning…what do you suggest? Chocolate, a little cocaine…

sex?

Haven’t heard back. Knowing her she’s doing research so she can deliver an accurate scientific response.

What does one say to someone like this really?

Two words…

Well five actually:

Lighten the fuck up Cupcake.

She’ll undoubtedly write back…cupcakes..too much sugar.

What else should we give up?

Humor…too much fun?               images-3

We should all die laughing, if we’re so lucky 🙂

SB

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in animals, food, Health, humor, Uncategorized, women and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

28 Responses to Milk It For What It’s Worth

  1. jimmie chew says:

    🙂 i like choco tacos, everyone yells at me how bad they are, but man are they good!!!!

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  2. micklively says:

    Cheese or life will be the death of me and I don’t care which. 😉
    Good post Susannah.

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    • Cheese can make your day…Brie with a nice hunk of Italian bread…sliced tomato…an apple on the side…sigh

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      • micklively says:

        Can’t beat a ripe stilton. I love a cheese that makes its own gravy!

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      • Oh my…they’d love you at Dean & Deluca where they sell a good 40 various types that could break your wallet in two. The guy behind the counter is always moaning in delight slicing off samples. I’m waiting for him to have a heart attack.

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      • micklively says:

        When I was in the US, I recall all the cheese was like soap. I obviously didn’t choose the same high-class purveyors as you. The bacon was crap too. Oh, and the beer. I loved the breakfasts and the pasta though. Oh, and the pizza.

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      • Ah, the pizza…yes…we excel there if you know where to go. My grandfather, who was a baker, taught me…if you have to blot your mozzarella with a napkin…run…it means it’s really cheap cheese that’s not really cheese at all…chemicals in cheese clothing.

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      • micklively says:

        The mozzarella we get comes with its own puddle. I think that must mean it’s really rubbish.

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      • OOH Mick…just got a chill. It’s like eating Silly Puddy. Did they have that in England?

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      • micklively says:

        Silly Puddy is not a phrase I recognise but I don’t claim to be an epicurean. I know the mozzarella has very little flavour. Fortunately, that is ameliorated by Maeve’s wonderful pizza bread. Tonight’s the night! 😉

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      • It’s a kid’s toy…you press it against comic books and it produces the image…it’s a big wad of rubber clay. Big when I was a kid….a stocking stuffer. Maeve’s pizza’s bread sounds good. My kind of cuisine.

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  3. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, I love cheese. Make that LOVE. But you’re right, don’t deprive, just moderate. I also am a candyholic. I limit myself to four or five red licorice strips each evening after dinner. And I confess, sometimes I run amuck and eat more.
    Viva la guilty dining pleasures! Life is too short.

    Like

    • I LOVE LICORICE TOO…BLACK PREFERABLY. I know moderation is key but most people when their doctor tells them their cholesterol is high panic and never have cheese again…not even Parmesan. It’s sad to me. Cutting back…but not cutting out. The thought of never tasting Brie again or even cream cheese puts me in a swoon.

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  4. katecrimmins says:

    I love dairy! I need the calcium. I could make a dinner of cheese. Now I don’t like licorice but I love black jelly beans. Yes, I know they are licorice and I know it doesn’t make sense. I may die of not making sense but I doubt if I’ll die of cheese. Moderation in all and keep the stress low.

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  5. Arthur Seder says:

    I was at dinner with my mother, brother, and sister (in CT!) the other evening and we were extensively reminscing about milk back in the old days – delivered by the milkman in those thick glass quart bottles, pasteurized but not homogonized, so you had to either skim the cream or shake the bottle vigorously. I was a voracious milk consumer till about 40, when I kind of migrated away from it, except for skim in my cereal or occasionally (if I’m feeling decadent) in my coffee. But in principle I’ve got nothing against it.

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  6. I read this sometime ago, and it seems fitting for your post, :
    “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.” 😛
    I say today to the fullest, who knows what’s coming your way tomorrow !

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    • OOH…but most of those women survived except for Mrs. Strauss, wife of the man who owned Macys Department Store, who insisted on staying with her husband…unbeknownst to her…his mistress was also on the boat and got into a lifeboat…this has nothing to do with dessert but came to mind mentioning that boat that is the reason you’ll never catch me on a cruise ship. I still get chills. Yes, seize the moment. I see ice-cream in my immediate future 🙂

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  7. Everything in moderation, right? Even moderation should be in moderation. I love dairy a lot. When I read Heidi and how they ate bread and cheese all the time, it sounds great to me. Lactose intolerance runs in my family though so I’m hoping I can dodge that.

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