Hormonally Speaking

images-1 My pal Camille and I had a discussion over the differences of our libidos, mine being missing in action, hers ready for it at any given time.

The conversation went something like this.

Me: Camille, I just don’t understand where you get the energy to still chase men.  When we were younger it was ingrained, but now the mere thought leaves me exhausted.

Camille: You just have a bad case of the olds.  Get over it. You’re as sexy as you choose to be.

Me: You sound like a bad infomercial, redundant as that may be…and it’s not just mental, and you know it.  Our bodies just don’t cooperate.

Camille: Speak for yourself. My body’s on board, looking pretty good I might add.

Me: Well, if you have anymore lipo you’ll look mummified. We can change your name to Tut.

Camille: Just remember who can still wear a bikini.

Me: You see, my goal is to never wear one again.

Camille: Then you can just kiss all those men goodbye.

Me: What men? Like that developer from Massapequa you met at the car show? He has a toupee, was indicted for tax fraud and wears enough gold around his neck to make him worth kidnapping. Don’t you think you’ve slipped a little?

Camille: I have you know he’s a real catch.

Me: One you should have thrown back in the water. Do you really need sex that bad?

Camille: Yes. Haven’t you ever heard, if you don’t use it, you’ll lose it?

Me: I have used it, and it deserves its retirement.

Camille: You know Dex has a friend.

Me: The fact that he’s called Dex is enough for me to run the other way. I’ll stick with my books thank you.

Camille: You can’t fuck a book.

Me: That’s what you think.  Depends what you’re reading.

SB

 

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
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18 Responses to Hormonally Speaking

  1. micklively says:

    You must read some very strangely shaped books Susannah.
    Just kidding.
    Very funny piece: you’ve brightened my day yet again.

    Like

  2. skinnyuz2b says:

    ‘Depends what you’re reading’ – ain’t that the truth!

    Like

  3. Elle Knowles says:

    I love your Camile stories. What a character! But truthfully speaking, you are right on target…~Elle

    Like

    • People have different priorities. I have my writing which fills many of my various holes, so to speak. Camille only has her ego that’s the size of Montana. She also hates being alone where I revel in it. We are very different but, opposites do attract.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Or what you are writing. I have written a very, ahem, well anyway book and it still excites me to reread it at times.

    Like

  5. One day Camille will drop dead from sheer exhaustion!

    Like

  6. Hahaha! We all have that one friend …. lol!

    Like

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