It’s very hard for me to kill anything having that Quaker/Shaker thing that says, I truly don’t have the right.
That said, I massacred a moth in my kitchen Swiffing him to death heartsick ever since.
He moved in a little over a week ago as a wee tot scaring me when he came tooling out of my lamp while I was reading. I had just spent 40 bucks having my two best sweaters sewn due to one of his predecessors then sprinkling cedar chips all throughout my closets.
Again, killing for me isn’t easy. I even relocate water bugs the size of Montana to avoid this, and my biggest fear is having a mouse appear because then what? I’d never have the heart to leave a trap. I’d have to give him towels and make room for him in the closet.
It was close to midnight as I lay reading cloaked in the peace and quiet of that solitary hour. I got up to brush my teeth so when I went to get my toothbrush who, now fully grown, comes flying from my medicine cabinet but Mr. Moth. He scared the crap out of me for starters, then got me thinking about my sweaters. Resembling a halfback, I knew he had to have a huge appetite…wool on rye?
He was flickering around darting everywhere in what I felt was an arrogant manner. He was just a guest after all and should have behaved like one. But like most men you let into your space, he took right over.
My ire and Italian both went up. “Who do you think you are acting that way? Enough or you’ll be sorry.”
He then started doing relays around the kitchen figuring I was all talk, and I was, even though I said…
“Are you mocking me there Mothie?”
I then took my Swiffer flailing it in the air figuring he’d get the point.
I brushed my teeth, but when I went to shut the light, who did I see crushed on the linoleum with a wing missing?
I tried reviving him picking him up with a spatula, but knew it was too late.
I didn’t mean to kill him, even though I wanted him gone. Like the roaches and water bugs who meander through, I was thinking of doing the same, moving him elsewhere, contemplating capture.
Well, karmically I guess I’ve just dropped a few notches, but it was an accident.
I did say a few words after I wrapped him in Kleenex placing him ever so gently in the trash.
It was the very least I could do.