Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe

For the likes of me, I can’t get these new doormen straight.  There are four that seem to blend, like madras bleeding in the wash.

It’s easy to recognize Felix because he only has one tooth, and Sampson, living up to his name, is 7 feet tall with arms like Popeye, but the rest have yet to leave an impression.

Don’t misunderstand, they are all kind and nice, jumping to attention whenever I appear, and my manners, such as they are, want to acknowledge them politely, but afraid to call them by name because I keep getting them wrong.

“Thanks Levi.”

“No, I’m Amos.”

“Oh, so sorry Amos, I thought you were Levi.”

They take it well, but I exit feeling like an elitist shit leaving the scent of not caring.

I must consult Frank who might have a tip since he’s the Bert Parks of supers.  Jovial, democratic, always ready with a handshake (unless your rugs were dumped on the street and he had to lug them in).

Maybe name tags might help, or a lobotomy, for me.

I’m from Connecticut, so I’ll make the first move.

“Okay Eeny?’

“No, I’m Meeny.”

“So sorry Meeny, see, I really thought you were Moe.”




About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
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23 Responses to Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe

  1. I have this problem too. Maybe not with multiple doormen, but telling groups of people apart.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. micklively says:

    Prosopagnosia on the East Side: could be the title of your next film.
    I can’t remember names or faces. I have all kinds of strategies to hide the fact: that part of my brain doesn’t work. I think nutting a tractor at 80 mph in 1980 might have left me a legacy. I shave without a mirror.


  3. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, I once had the same problem with two of the people who worked directly under me. Most of our contact was by phone, I only saw them about once a week. I was fine if they were together, but separately I couldn’t decide which was which. I finally zeroed in on a tiny dark spot that one had on his earlobe! I would have been sunk if he ever began growing his hair long!


  4. Elle Knowles says:

    Hopefully you have the names right even if they aren’t attached to the right doorman. I have called H’s drum major Britney all year. Her name is Destiny. For some reason she looks like a Britney to me and it stuck in my head. I told her about it. She laughed. Now she answers to Britney if I call. 😂 ~Elle

    Liked by 1 person

  5. When I worked there were two morbidly obese women in the same building. They looked very similar (at least to me). One day I addressed one incorrectly and she was so offended. I wanted to say “but you weigh the same” but I didn’t. I never used names for them after that. Name tags are great. I asked the manager at my local Starbucks to use them. It’s wonderful to be able to call people by their correct name. Usually I only need them for a month and then I remember…sometimes.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Patricia says:

    I am pretty good putting the right name to a face. I think it’s because I worked straight commission for so long. Greet someone by name even when you see them outside of where you work does wonders for the paycheck.

    Liked by 1 person

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