An Elegant Man

What constitutes one…let’s see all parts creating the whole.

images-6  13847794f236174c05aa4c2b88606dea-1  images-3  images-1

There has to be an air to him, whether he’s in a fine suit or a pair of chinos.  The way he carries himself is important.  I know deportment sounds like bullshit from a finishing school, but it does have its point.  There’s nothing more of an eyesore than a man with bad posture, like he’s hiding something between his shoulder blades.

Clean clothes also make the difference.  Have you ever faced a guy across a table with stains on his shirt?  My mother comes to life when it takes everything I have not to spit on a napkin and rub them off.  A girl doesn’t need to know what you had for lunch at dinner.

Also, a man who takes the time to clean and press tolls self-worth like the bells at Notre Dame.   getPart(My friend Ed)

Women like a confident male, as long as he doesn’t boast from the appetizer clear through to dessert.  It’s more in his demeanor than speech.  Then it works the opposite.  His need to bray translates into insecurity.  OOH…THE LAST THING A WOMAN WANTS TO HEAR (or in my case, sort of hear).

And last but not least, good manners.  I met a man I like, alas, though taken, for a drink at a nearby cafe who stood up as I entered.  You want to turn a girl on?  Treat her like a lady.  It’s the nicest thing you could do for her.  My femininity is rusty, and not because I’m wearing overalls and driving a Harley, I’m still quite the girl, just not where men are concerned.  When my hearing went south, so did my colors folding like old Confederate flags.

One of those flags fluttered while getting dressed pointing to a favorite black dress I slipped into like an old friend who came a’callin.  Sleek black hose, pumps…a Jackie scarf tied around my neck.

There was indeed a lady in the house.

My friend in his crisp white, open-collared (stainless) button-down beneath a deep navy blazer, a pocket scarf winking from its pocket, looked like a Polo ad with a slice of Tom Ford tossed in.

The definition of elegance, according to Webster’s…pleasingly graceful and stylish in appearance or manner.  Dignity, poise, refinement and taste.  Sophistication, charm, culture and allure.  Polish, panache, dash and pluck.

Words that dazzle before a man or woman even tries them on.

There’s something to be said for taking the time to don that dress or fold one’s pocket scarf.  A respect of sorts for oneself and those in your company.

As I faced my friend while he ordered for two, I remembered what it was like to be treated like a woman, by a man with distinction, a healthy sense of self and a wine list.  images-7




About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in alcohol, Beauty, Connecticut, dessert, Fashion, food, friendship, humor, men, money, New York City, sexual relationships, Women and men, words and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

28 Responses to An Elegant Man

  1. I always felt Cary Grant possessed all of the above. Plus he had the wit and self-deprecating humor that suggested he never took himself too seriously. Another aspect of his behavior was a sense of gentleness. There was a lot to admire about the man.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. He has that look about him. But please, don’t remove Tyrone. I liked him too. Maybe you could just include Mr. Grant.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. skinnyuz2b says:

    Yes, Susannah, it is a trait recognized instantly. Pieces of it can be learned, but you need the whole package. My youngest son is very very close; a truly debonair gentleman. The ladies love him and he only goes out with ladies. At the tender age of 28 he likes his ladies on the modest side.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Awe, we love that Skinny, and I wonder who his role model was for those ladies on the modest side 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • skinnyuz2b says:

        Not me, ha ha! When I was younger I was a bit on the wild side. And I may be 65 now, but I don’t dress like an old lady. I have NO idea where this part of him came from.
        He almost had a fit when yoga pants became the norm in college. I didn’t say anything while he told me how he couldn’t believe so many girls wore them, but I was silently thinking, “I would have worn them!”


  4. Sometimes I wonder how sloppy guys with no good swag get women but they do. Oh wait, they aren’t ladies…..

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Elle Knowles says:

    So glad you added Cary in the line-up Susannah. He’s my favorite. I feel Andrew may make that list one day. He’s well on his way! 😉 ~Elle

    Liked by 1 person

  6. micklively says:

    I fall at the first fence: always covered in dog-hair. Sniff.


  7. Cary Grant is timeless hotness! Ed belongs on TV giving fashion/manner tips to the needy, which unfortunately includes entire generations. Men in pajama pants outside of the privacy of their own cave is becoming the norm…I can’t.
    When I was in NY I stopped in The Plaza. They had a glass case filled with Gentlemen Necessities. Class in glass if you will. It needed one of those “Break in case of an emergency” signs for the society we’re living in.

    Liked by 1 person

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