The Queen, Clooney and Captain Jack

    It’s amazing what one learns standing in front of a newsstand.
      Clooney’s having a baby as though he were the one giving birth,


      Queen Elizabeth is gracing the cover of Vanity Fair with her dogs rather than her husband,


      and Johnny Depp is having a really bad day, several actually.


      His fetus of a wife claims he beat her as though he were Joey Buttafuoco not Captain Jack.  Mrs. Depp seems out of her depths, if you ask me since, there’s something redundant about airing your dirty linen to The New York Post and People Magazine.  I guess The Onion and Rival Comics both passed.  Hey Johnny, was it really a beating or just a little shove?  You know how babies exaggerate.  And not everyone’s Kate Moss who probably kinda liked it, that Kate.  But John, what I’d really like to know is, were you dropped on your head not signing a prenuptial agreement with a 21 year-old?  I’m romantic too, but then my net worth is 400 bucks, not 400 mill.

 Johnny Johnny Johnny

      One has to wonder how Prince Philip felt when those corgis were in makeup instead of him, his wife’s preference saying it all about old Phil, and as far as Clooney becoming a dad, between his good looks and Amal’s beauty, that’s gonna be one hellova baby.


    Gotta go, the train’s comin.

About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
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15 Responses to The Queen, Clooney and Captain Jack

  1. micklively says:

    I’ve never met any of them. George and Amal seem like good folk, and I have nothing against the corgies.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, I always thought it would be fun writing/making up stories for those magazines. I could come up with some whoppers, although some of the stories in the past would be pretty hard to beat. Writing the fortunes in fortune cookies would be fun, too.
    We could come up with a great tale about why the Queen had her corgis instead of Phil. Just think of the possibilities: He’s locked in the tower after going totally insane; she does it doggy-style; the corgis are really aliens that control her mind and country; etc.


  3. Elle Knowles says:

    Thanks for the short version! I’m always amazed at some of the news that makes it front and center…~Elle


  4. I want to know by Miranda and Taylor hate each other? Maybe they don’t. Why does that make news?

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Patricia says:

    The dogs are better looking than the man and apt to sell more mags then him…or Liz. No prenup! Johnny looks handsomely smart…looks are deceiving. So George is going to be a daddy…lucky baby. Thanks for the updates…I had no clue.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Susannah, you often nail it in your posts, but this one said it all so perfectly.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Corgis have so much more personality than that husband. Did you know that they lay on their backs, stiff as a board? I didn’t either until I saw my neighbors Corgi doing it and knocked on their door crying thinking that little jokester was dead!

    Liked by 1 person

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