Birds do It…Bees Do It

And even squirrels in Central Park, it seems, do it like little gray porn stars.

There I was in full stride when I see two of the randiest squirrels going at it like Liz and Dick.  I mean WOW…were they engaged, well let’s hope so anyway.  Don’t want to think it was just a one-morning-stand after all.  Liz was no lady, let me tell you, the way she clutched at Dick with her tail flashing in his face, like a frenetic fan dance.

Well, that kind of action can only mean, spring is really here.

The geese are all paired off which means they’ve been doing it already since she is probably in her first trimester which, for a goose, is like a day and a half.  From what I’ve read, the male is very attentive, always walking behind making sure she’s safe, but the minute she gives birth, he’s humming Bye Bye Birdie, leaving his lady fair flat, the fickle, feathered fucker that he is.

Nature can be cruel at times, mysterious, funny, but most of the time, pretty glorious.

And that’s why birds do it, bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let’s do it, let’s fall in love

Cold Cape Cod clams, ‘gainst their wish, do it
Even lazy jellyfish do it
Let’s do it, let’s fall in love…

 Some Argentines, without means do it
I hear even Boston beans do it
Let’s do it, let’s fall in love…

   Cole Porter

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in animals, Family, humor, music, nature, New York City, sex, Women and men, words and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

25 Responses to Birds do It…Bees Do It

  1. micklively says:

    They (and we) are just being conned by our genes. Isn’t it wonderful? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  2. skinnyuz2b says:

    Good news, Susannah. Goose daddys, at least Canada Geese, stay around until they all fly south. We have two sets of families on our pond, with 3 and 5 babies. The mom and dad take turns watching for predators while everyone else eats. When it’s time for flying lessons, one stays at the launch/landing pad while the other flys point guard.
    Speaking of doing it, not only are our fish are frisky (they rub against each other), but a few days ago I saw two large painted turtles at it. They spent about ten minutes rolling around on the water surface.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Spring is so much better with sex. My pond is brimming with lust.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yep, skinny was right about the Canadian Geese. Sounds like those male New York Geese are a bit flighty.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Squirrels are sluts. There I said it. They’ve been whoring it up on my deck for weeks, leaving broken peanut shells all over my swing cushions. I’m waiting to see them lying there smoking cigarettes!

    Liked by 1 person

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