Since I’ve moved into my new place, I’ve been criticized for my neatness.
Sounds odd, right?
The first person to question it, came with gifts and good cheer saying, “You need to come to my house next time.” She lives in a huge, old place I truly wanted to see.
My apartment is old too, just lovingly restored by its previous tenant.
Then I get an email disinviting me. “I have to clean before you come. You are so damned neat, I can’t let you visit.”
I guess she still hasn’t because the invitation was never reissued.
Then someone else, who without even asking, opened my closet and said, “Jesus Susannah…you’re so fucking anal the way your dresses are lined up. I guess now I have to go home and clean my own closet. ”
My spareness…spotless, unsullied and a tad pristine, seems to be giving me a bad name.
Clutter: a collection of things lying about in an untidy fashion.
A mess, mass, litter or heap. Confusion, chaos, disarray…a hodgepodge of disorder. Untidiness, debris…an accumulation of things of little value. Junk-piles, stockpiles, possessions one doesn’t need.
I’m positively preening in my state of clutter-less-ness.
This is what I know. We have control over very little. Think about it. Life has the last say, whether it’s ultimately our health, success in love or how the world treats us. The rough and rude, inappropriate and discourteous. Toss in insensitive, and we’re really off to the unbridled races.
Our home environment is the one area we have a say in.
Every Sunday I clean. I can’t afford my cleaning lady right now, so I’ve become Hazel in a twinset. It’s No Worry Sunday, when I disregard all my troubles starting the day with soap and water.
It’s very Franciscan to clean ones own home. I always said, I wasn’t very good at it, but see, that was a myth created in order to get someone else to do it.
When I’m all done and the place smells of Lemon Oil and Ivory Soap, Mr Clean and fresh air since the windows are wide open, I feel free, is the only way to describe it.
My neighbor down the hall is a bit of clutter-bug. He said, it’s hard to get rid of anything, even his newspapers because they make him feel comforted. I thought about this, how different we all are, which I respect.
I’m comforted when there is no excess anywhere, that whatever I see has purpose and loved by me. If not, out it goes to the closest thrift shop because guaranteed, someone else will treasure what no longer serves me.
My apartment is filled with other people’s gifting.
That said...clutter….to amass muddles of merde, the French term for shit, that sounds so much nicer.
I think I’ll go dust the hangers holding my lineup of dresses, since, you never know when someone’s gonna, without notice, open up your closet.
SB
Disinvited you? The nerve! I’d invite you hoping some of that neatness would rub off on me. Really – I start out neat then it doesn’t take much to go down hill. My neatness comes in spurts! ~Elle
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You also don’t live alone. It’s harder to be that way when there are others to consider. I like feeling contained. It’s more manageable, another reason.
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True…I pick up after others and also myself. I would love to have no clutter though. It doesn’t seem to bother H.
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I think people with clutter truly don’t see it.
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They don’t! You’re right.
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🙂
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I’m sure a psychiatrist could have a field day with this. 😉
What I find interesting is the extent to which others find your order a challenge. Why does it immediately become a competition or maybe a threat for them?
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Good question. It must be troubling in some way, like when your mother yelled at you to clean your room, like that little sign I put up. I have to try not to feel bad at my end, like I’ve done something wrong. Yes, a shrink would have a field day. 🙂
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Susannah, you are simply clean and neat. Something my honey and I are when we don’t have returning children in the nest.
Anal is a whole different kettle of worms. My brother-in-law is anal, followed closely by my his wife. They wouldn’t light a fire in the fireplace of their new home for the first SIX years because it would make it messy. And we live in the north country where it gets cold.
I just shampooed my living and family room carpets yesterday. I agree with you, when things are clean and in their place it makes me feel happy. And like you, if someone else’s home is clean, but cluttered, it doesn’t bother me a whit and I don’t think any less of them. We all have our own priorities.
PS I bet that nosey-parker peaks in people’s medicine cabinets, too.
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Nosey Parkers, love that. Life just seems simpler when there’s a certain amount of order. Bet your rugs look and smell nice. 🙂
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That is so odd. I have areas I keep very neat like my kitchen but my office desk always has a few piles which I clear only to have them clutter up again. I no longer feel bad about the cat hair on the chairs either. Why someone would disinvite you for fear of your disapproval surprises me. You rarely disapprove of anything. Next time she comes over, throw a blouse on the floor to make her feel at home.
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You made me laugh with your blouse line. This is true. I’m pretty democratic when it comes to disapproving about anything. I have no explanation except, cleanliness may make people nervous. For me, less is more. Hey…what can I say Crimmins.
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I so identify with this. The more out of control my life feels the more I have to clean and organize. When I am down instead of burying my face in a pillow I start cleaning the closet yet again. But I also like to organize when things are going well. I don’t mind my friend’s houses being a mess, but I have this incredible urge to start cleaning and organizing. I love the feeling I get when I am done, the place smells amazing, no clutter in sight, it feels like order has been restored in the world! 🙂
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I’m glad someone else feels that way. Order is a real comfort. I’ve been told, no one lives the way I do, but that just isn’t so, now is it. 🙂
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No better feeling than cleaning products and open windows. The BEST!
I have a sister-in-law who ALWAYS makes comments to me about my home … ALWAYS. Her house would be in order too, if it weren’t for the 50,000 angel figurines! I don’t walk in her house and make comments like “Will Jesus be joining us?” I just visit and leave.
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Love the 50,000 angel figurines. Lol. Mimi had little Africans all over the place. Was like a miniature uprising. I’m always amazed at the amount of hair-trigger criticism that comes my way. If I visited someone say, in their trailer home I’d never remark about their empty beer cans. I’d say something positive like, oh I like Bud too. 🙂
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“Uprising” … I’m crying!! Sadly my eyes have seen this look.
I had someone say “you have it together” Ummm, no I have “it” shoved in a closet because you were coming over. People and their damn judgements…I just can’t.
We need more Patty Positives in this world!
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Patty Positive? I love her. You could just her, made by Mattel. lOL
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I detest clutter and love the way you phrased it – “whatever I see has purpose and loved by me.” I have also experienced odd comments and lack of invites as a result. I have a friend in Queens that I see when I’m in the neighborhood, but she’d rather meet for dinner than hang out at her place. Last time I was there, the house looked great, and she commented, “It doesn’t always look like this.” Like I care.
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Bingo! Like we care. They care. It embarrasses them and rather than their clutter, we become the culprit. Freud would have a field day with that.
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You’ve hit on a topic that’s always been a irritant for me. Family and friends remark how clean my house is and how organized I am, somehow managing to masticate their compliments and spit them out as insults.
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Me too. I’m afraid to invite anyone over. My two best friends who had such lovely, CLEAN, organized homes are both dead. I loved visiting. They really influenced me. Those I know now think I’m from another planet. This morning I cleaned from 7 till 11. The order and shine makes me so happy. Sigh
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