I came upon a woman having an argument with her bulldog she was clearly losing, who refused to move.
“Listen Bully, I’m going to be late for work if you don’t get with the program here.”
Bully, like all bulldogs, bearing a striking resemblance to Winston Churchill, stubbornly couldn’t have cared less. Personally, I think he was just enjoying the breeze billowing off the park and needed a moment to himself. Since it was right in front of my building, I felt in my right to watch. She did everything short of just leaving him there. She pulled, which did nothing since he was the size of Montana. She pleaded…
“Come on Bullski, do it for your mama.”
Even the bagel she pulled out of her peacoat pocket held no sway. Bully wouldn’t budge.
I had to get into the act.
“Awe, what is it handsome, you havin a tough mornin?” Like most men he responded to flattery. He didn’t move, but sat up giving me his best side.
“Why didn’t I just get a Lab, or Beagle, the woman said.”
OOPS…big mistake since guess who was back, on his back, now with his eyes closed.
Animals are more sensitive than we think. I winked at his owner.
“Ya know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a cute, cuddling doggie as your Bully. I mean look at him. I just want to hug the hell out of him.”
Well guess who got up strolling over like the Cary Grant of bulldogs. Okay, it was more Jackie Gleason, who was very light on his feet by the away, to collect that hug.
And I did not disappoint.
I nuzzled his nose and scratched his head, that was bigger than mine…tickled his belly, even kissed his paws. His mother looked like she needed a transfusion seeing him bask like a fat pasha.
I finally said,”Now Bully, your mom has to go to work so run on home, and maybe she’ll let you come by for a visit.” She shook her head yes, I think more from shock since Bully was now up pulling her.
It all comes down to how you talk to a man, and of course a good belly rub never hurts.