Put Up Your Nukes


 


Am I never safe from the assholes of the world?

I’m in Tiramisu, a cheap, casual bistro near my house, eating a little pasta.  I’m in a good mood since, when I’m done, will be heading to the library for a nice, long read.

It’s Thanksgiving weekend, after all, so nothing is pressing, and there’s a certain amount of peace to that.  However, like a sniper packing pizza, this idiot with two lipsticked, heavily mascaraed girls sporting boobs like cannons says to me,” Isn’t it great Castro finally fuckin died?”

Now perhaps it’s because I’m not drinking, or still have decorum so late in life, but this declaration is clearly unacceptable, so on behalf of Fidel and those of us not braindead said,”EXCUSE ME? DID I JUST HEAR YOU RIGHT?”

Now remember, I don’t always hear correctly, so there was a slight possibility I heard wrong.

No chance sparky.

The schmuck with the two Kardashian wannabes, is elated over the news. I know Senor Cuba was a thorn in our side since no one knows history better than me.

Cuban Missile Crisis?  JFK hiring the mob to take him out…hey, I could lecture on the man, but to applaud someone’s demise to a girl from Connecticut who’s stoned sober, is a bit risky.

So I pick up the rope, as they say, in 12 Step.

“Let me ask you something, if you don’t mind…were you dropped on your head?  Do you think it’s prudent to publicly say you’re happy someone died?  I don’t care who it is.”

I realize, at once, he has no clue what prudent means. Then Tart number 1 says, “Can’t we just eat…like whore cazs?”

Whore indeed.

Tart number 2 with cheese dripping down her chin adds,”Not me mother-fucka. The only Castro I know is in my livin-room.”

See, this is my fault for eating at a place to save a few bucks.  If I had gone to my usual joint yes, I’d be in debt, but much less offended.  In the future, we will weigh what’s important.

I know this redneck isn’t worth my time and who cazs what stupid thing, cheesy or otherwise, comes out of his mouth.

I certainly have no attachment to the late Fidel, but we’re supposed to be the example, are we not?

I proceed to put my out of joint nose in a newspaper to detach from The Dukes of Hazard, but then encounter Tart number 2 in the ladies room who says, “Do ya recommen ana-thin fa dassert?”

You, on pie.

No I didn’t say that.

I was gracious and just said…

“What an interesting color lipstick.  Is it blood orange?

AYE

SB

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in alcohol, dessert, food, History, humor, New York City, Politics, Uncategorized, Women and men, words and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

30 Responses to Put Up Your Nukes

  1. Gail says:

    Next time out for an Italian lunch, go to Lex Restaurant.

    Like

  2. Coyote from Orion says:

    He was a survivor. Got to respect that at least

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Unless you were born in Cuba or affected in some way, I don’t know why he would care. Obviously Bimbo and Bimbette didn’t. People say the damndest things to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Patricia says:

    I rarely have any kind of conversation with strangers. Lots of smiles and hello’s but nothing controversial or unusual. Maybe it’s a New York thing. 😺

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m like fly paper and always on high alert. I’m alone most of the time observing so that might be part of it. Flaneur is the French word I believe when you’re a quiet though vigilant spectator. Hope you and the boys had a nice Thanksgiving.

      Like

  5. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, I think that trio was a lost cause.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I don’t see why you are surprised. The reaction is understandable , maybe they’re not up to Connecticut standards . However , were they possibly Cubanos ? I grew up in an area that absorbed many of the first wave of Cubans to arrive here in 59 / 60 . Went to school with loads of them . All had the same story , family businesses , plantations , homes taken at gunpoint . Separation of grandparents , aunts uncles , many brutally murdered . I worked with a parish priest when I was a boy , on Saturdays we would bring second hand furniture , beds , and clothing to many of these families living in tenements in Hoboken ( before it was chic) Union City , And other Hudson County towns . I saw and heard very young how these people suffered . Yet they persevered a many to regain successful lives . This past Thanksgiving coincidentally I spent the day with three Cubans , young friends and coworkers of my daughter . I alwAys ask all these years later what they think of that Infidel Fidel . The answers are much the same , negative . America ? They love this country and the freedom we enjoy . They are an industrious people who understand that Communism enslaves and kills men’s souls . So perhaps those words you heard were harsh , but he imprisoned , and killed thousands and caused much grief . I think we can afford a little leeway here . Or am I being hateful ?

    Like

  7. Rob says:

    Mourn the passing of Fidel: a true hero, who stood up to the bullies on his doorstep for decades and triumphed.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Funny you should say that. Received a comment I approved but didn’t answer the person missing the whole point of my post. He slurred Connecticut like that’s why I felt that was an inappropriate remark. What can I say. Our world needs restoration, with or without Fidel.

      Like

  8. Ross de Marco says:

    My point was not everyone is up to the same standards as yours . I’m not Cuban but have known many of them and can empathize with their feelings of relief or closure to a man who’s reign was one of a monster . These people whatever their nationality could have had similar experiences to mine No true hero has to imprison people on an island where they are not permitted to leave or speak out against injustice . Free will is an God give right , we can choose to follow or not to . As far as a bully on their doorstep , Rob just “slurred” an entire nation . A hero who gives sanctuary to the likes of Joann Chesimard?I think I’d take America over Cuba anytime. As for Infidel Castro , I hope he finds greater mercy than he showed . The Connecticut thing ? Omg .

    Like

  9. It seems as if people are using public space as a personal platform to spew their harsh opinions for nothing more than a reaction. Hmm …. I wonder where that could be coming from?

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Just your luck. You go out for lunch, and run into a few people who are also out to lunch—in a manner of speaking. Or was it the Three Stooges? 😀

    Liked by 1 person

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