Complimentary Porn

What is it I write about that invite porn sites on my blog, I keep deleting?

I know I can be saucy at times, but I’m not exactly the Marquis de Sade.

I’m told daily, porn will change my life, something I agree with since it could easily land me in jail.

Now they’re wooing me on my personal email like randy men in hot pursuit.

Hear ye, hear ye…

all you professional wankers out there…I’m from Connecticut, anything remotely related to jerking-off is done in the privacy of one’s chintz covered bedroom, so could you please peddle your porn to a more appropriate place like Hustler’s homepage.

You’ll have to excuse me now, I’m embroidering my initials on a hanky while soaking a white button-down in bleach, baking a cinnamon apple pie, and no, I am not naked.

I’M FROM CONNECTICUT.  june-cleaver

SB

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in Connecticut, food, Home, humor, writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to Complimentary Porn

  1. Hahaha! The risk of burnin the nether regions is much too high to bake in the nude anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, I used to constantly get email ads for male enhancement and/or performance improvement. It never let up until I switched to a new laptop and changed my email address. Once one of those worms blazes a trail into your domain, the rest of the slime quickly crawls in. I don’t know of any semi-easy solution. Too bad we can’t just call the Orkin Man or Cat’s Eye to exterminate the vermin.
    As the saying goes, “We can put a man on the moon, but …’

    Liked by 1 person

    • I always wonder how they hack you, for lack of a better word. My spam sometimes has as many as 15. I delete, and delete but they keep on coming. I might write to WordPress to see what can be done. Oh Skinny…the perils of cyber life.

      Like

  3. As long as it gets caught with your spam filter, I wouldn’t get too concerned. If it’s getting passed that, it’s annoying. You attract all sorts of things…. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. George says:

    The always hot Mrs Cleaver..:)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. micklively says:

    They do it because it works, for them, at least. We get what we deserve, collectively, if not individually.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. “land in jail”? You would have to do some pretty rough stuff to be put in jail today. Anything much outside of underage stuff is legal as far as I know. But, yes, the spam can be intolerable at times.
    Scott

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Elle Knowles says:

    I often wonder how they find us! It’s not like you’ve gone out and advertised!

    Liked by 1 person

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