Stapled Shut

Only I would get stuck on an elevator buying batteries at Staples, the Gap of office supplies.

It’s a one flight-er, an escalator going back down. I’m on it along with a black woman the size of Kansas needing post-its for her boss.

“She get so mad when she run out,” she tells me.

“Well, you tell Ms Message for me, to lighten the hell up.”

Yes, I said that, my empathy being at bay after the first five minutes, the classic claustrophobic that I am.

When she gets on her phone because yes, we have Wi-Fi in place of Muzak, the cage’s only redeeming feature, I become just a tad edgier.


After startling her so, she jumps…all 250 pounds of her, and guess what?

The elevator begins to move.

Just another tale in the Naked City..:)

About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in comedy, humor, New York City, women and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

27 Responses to Stapled Shut

  1. Elle Knowles says:

    Laughing!!! Good thinkg you had her next to you after all! There’s a lot to say about weight… ~Elle

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Coyote from Orion says:

    I like that song off KISS, Unmasked.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Soul Gifts says:

    LOL! My husband got stuck in an elevator once in a city store. Full of people. And you’ll never guess – a voice from the back says “I’m pregnant…” he and another fellow managed to wedge the door open with their briefcases. It was stuck just a bit below floor level. between them they helped everyone out. Not a single person said thanks as they walked off!


  4. Patricia says:

    Good thing she weighed in hefty if that’s what it took to get the elevator moving.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. micklively says:

    I love the idea of kick-starting an electric motor. The Road Runner would be proud. Bneep Bneep!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I hate elevators. I’m claustrophobic. I worked on the 17th floor of a skyscraper for 3 years. Bleah! Often took the stairs down.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hahahahaha! I know her face must have been classic!

    Liked by 1 person

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