Sniper Shootings

I must be giving off one helluva scent because anyone and everyone with a gripe or grievance has graced my path.

Recently, when I was working, an older woman started to scream at me over something I had nothing to do with.  I found myself talking to her like she was armed and dangerous. There were a good 40 other people in the room, so you ask yourself, why me?

Just now I went to the little coffee shop in my old neighborhood, since I’ve stopped going to Starbucks midday.  My coffee intake has gotten way out of hand so I’ve been having a weaker blend to curb my habit.  That said…I go in and the counter man who I’ve known for years is so rude to me I’m taken aback.  “You okay?” I ask, figuring it couldn’t be about me.

“Just tell me what you want,” he snaps, snarling like I just spliced his tires.

I should have just did an about-face, but instead ignored it, and got a coffee anyway.  I try to ride the wave of rudeness, don’t ask me why, hoping it will dispel somehow.  Wishful thinking on Thingirl’s part.

Then I see a doorman I know who ignores me when I’m standing right next to him.  “No good morning?” I say with a smile.

“I said good morning,” he says.

“Oh, I didn’t hear you.  I have hearing issues you know.”

“Then you better get-em fixed,” he says, leaving me standing there feeling two feet tall.

I do wonder why we attract this kind of behavior from others whose tongue suddenly becomes a concealed weapon.

My first chord is kindness, despite feeling attacked.  Rather than respond in kind, I choose to be the example as stupid as it sounds even to me.

I went over to see Peter the other doorman I’ve known forever, the sage at 1140 Park.

He said, “Ya know, it’s really sad when people act like that.  You have to feel sorry for-em Susannah.  You do know it’s not you…it’s them.”

I took this in while eating pound cake his wife made while tears rolled down my cheeks. (I’m an Italian Cancerian from Connecticut…what do you expect?)

“You know Peter.  I did notice Steve at the coffee shop has looked really upset lately.  And as far as Chris goes, I guess if you’ve never had a medical problem that’s slowed you down, it’s hard for you to get it.”

He shook his head yes while we had more cake.

“I hope he never finds out either.”

“That’s right,” Peter said, “if his heart can’t open…open yours twice as wide.”

“I’m gonna go get us coffee from the deli,” I said.  Screw my caffeine intake.

“Okay, make mine a tea.”


About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in Faith, friendship, humanity, New York City, Starbucks, Women and men and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

22 Responses to Sniper Shootings

  1. Gail Kaufman says:

    Funny you should bring this up. I’ve encountered an unusually high level of rudeness at work lately. There must be something in the northeastern air.

    Since I work remotely, the primary communication modes are email and instant message. Somehow it irks me more in writing than verbally, harsh words staring me in the face without the ability to respond with an evil eye and an about-face. I don’t necessarily take it personally, realizing everyone has their own agenda. Sometimes, I reply professionally, choosing to set the example, as you said. Other times, it seems the sender just wants the last word, in which case I let it go and don’t reply at all. Either way, it’s not only maddening but confusing. They would never communicate that way to a client or superior. What makes people think it is acceptable to pick and choose who is deserving of kindness or at least diplomacy?

    That unbecoming behavior will circle back to them eventually. Or maybe your doorman is right. It could be their rudeness reflects that life has already handed them a blow.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. micklively says:

    Peter is right: it’s a mistake to take it personally. Who knows what’s going on in their lives? Everybody has a breaking point. Sometimes, the release valve has to blow and innocent bystanders can get hurt. That is not to condone, of course, but understanding goes a long way.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I get that…but, it’s no longer rare behavior but becoming more the norm. The world is bleeding with no sufficient turnnicet, which I’ve spelled wrong, in sight. Common courtesy is extinct right up there with eagles and flowers blooming when they’re supposed to. Sigh

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Gail is right, there is definitely something in the air. Everyone seems to be walking around pissed off at the world, and maybe they are but damn it’s getting old. Just be careful, it can be contagious.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, despite knowing that Peter is right, it’s almost inhuman not to take it personally. It never takes much to bring out the buried insecurities.
    I have one sister-in-law (on Pookie’s side of the family) that makes it a habit to be as rude to any and all as she can. Some people are simply born to be bristly, just be thankful they only come into your life in passing and don’t live with you.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. micklively says:

    Give a little bit of love, as Marcella said. It’s an uphill battle. I understand your frustration, I really do, but I have no magic wand. I can only say we’re better off than many. Be happy you don’t live in Idlib and can still sigh.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Everyone is agitated right now. The world is crazy. People killing people. People in high spots talking stupid. It wears on you. Still…that’s no excuse. Put on your Connecticut smile for them and when they wound you, seek solace in that cake with Peter because that’s what friends are for.


  7. Elle Knowles says:

    You can catch more flys with honey than you can with vinegar is what my mother always told me. It’s your nature to be kind and understanding but it’s hard sometimes to turn the other cheek! ~Elle

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I was so blessed to move among humane people when i lived on Long Island. I saw people being ugly to each other at the mall or the post office occasionally, but in later years I rarely went there. You are on the firing line in the city! May I send you some smiles and hugs for yourself and some to give to others? ((((()))))

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Patricia says:

    For all the uglies you met up with you ended with Peter, a friend and wise man with cake. Maybe those other folks don’t have a Peter to help them through the rough spots. Sad, isn’t it?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Good point. Chris, who’s Irish of the imported variety meaning he is tough with an accent, is married to a sassy woman who makes 3 of him. She snarls and smokes like a tugboat. Steve who’s Greek, married into a family who uses him like a plow horse so yes, I think much back cake is owed them.


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