The Weight

I watch struggling women all the time, spending their lives obsessed with their weight.

I see them when I’m running, smothered in Spandex, a fabric that doesn’t breathe hoping   they look thinner, when all it does it accentuate their girth…their skin looking like consommé when they get home.

I often say…thank God, with all my problems, weight isn’t one of them.  If anything, I could gain a few pounds.

But my heart still goes out to those who think thin makes them who they are, because I know what it must be like, the all consuming end of it.

OMG…I SHOULDN’T HAVE HAD THAT PIE OR EXTRA GLASS OF WINE.  IF I DON’T EAT TILL THURSDAY, THEN IT WILL BE OKAY. RIGHT? as she shoves another cookie, cigarette or cell phone in her mouth to tell a friend for the umpteen time.

It’s sad, really, to live your life this way, chronically on a scale, hysterical if it goes up an ounce.  Diets are fruitless since they’re so temporary.  The moment you stop eating only grapefruit or that low fat soy shake, the pounds return like unwanted houseguests.

That’s why Weight Watchers is so successful.  They teach you how to eat proportionately without starving.

Recently I met a girl I often see running, twenty-one if she’s a day.  “I’m depressed,” she told me, so I said, “Why don’t you go for a run…that always helps me.”

“YOU THINK I’M FAT!” she said, bursting into tears.

“No I don’t.  I just know you like the park.”

Twenty-one and she’s obsessed, and thin as a rail I might add.

Eating disorders, irrational ways of looking at ourselves still run rampant in our society.

Who should we blame it on?  Kate Moss, Vogue…our mothers who chided us into skipping dessert calling us fatties if we ordered that dish of ice cream?

Apparently even Jackie did that to Caroline when she, at one point, started to fill out, like it was the worse thing in the world to gain a pound or two.

I don’t know.

I’m just eternally grateful I don’t spend my life looking in the mirror anymore.

I yam what I yam, after all.

And boy, is it a grace.

SB

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in Beauty, dessert, Family, Fashion, Health, humor, modeling, New York City, parents, women and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

56 Responses to The Weight

  1. Elle Knowles says:

    You are blessed. I have been also, but waiting for it to catch up with me one day. When it does, I’ll say “to heck with it!” ~Elle

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  2. Coyote from Orion says:

    I have been committed, behind the eyes of most, and regularly we would be with the girls with eating disorders. All of them highly intelligent. All the victims in some way of advertising and mainstream communications whilst living with lesser intelligent people no matter how well intentioned. When all the medical professionals are on a break or at the nurses this is one of the grratest evils ever to take beautiful and intelligent young girls from broad daylight in front of us. Good on you for listening Susannah. Ironic that you have challenges to your hearing. All some people care about it their own home and getting rich… it’s all about the optics boasted the Australian man recently for the Carlyle group.

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    • Eating disorders are so common, you’re so right. And it’s a real shame. I guess one can also hear with their eyes…:)

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      • Coyote from Orion says:

        Most of them would be dead by now. Of those of us that sick in the 90’s and in that place, my survival is an anomaly. My recital those fallen often phased out with music… or this days new medicos are often sedated before any of us are 😉
        Dance then wherever you may be 😇😇🤣🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      • The fallen… sigh. To quote Allen Ginsberg, light a candle and keep on dancing.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Coyote from Orion says:

        I guess that would be all he could have done. Ewan McGregor in Trainspotting just said…. I’m gonna cook up.

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      • Shouldn’t you be sleeping?

        Liked by 1 person

      • Coyote from Orion says:

        1915 here. At an open mic…. how did you know it was this bad

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      • It’s 5:30 am here. It’s still dark as I sit in Starbucks already on my second cup of coffee. It feels as if you’re always up.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Coyote from Orion says:

        Lovely. I sleep about 4 hours a night usually. I do transcendental meditation twice a day. It helps with a lot of things. Sometimes I am alone peaceful and grateful to be alive what I went through and left half my soul or brain behind 😇

        Liked by 1 person

      • Gratitude is a great place to dwell in. I make a daily list to remind me of all the good. You’re a smart Coyote.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Coyote from Orion says:

        The Bard is having a battle with back pain. Poor bloke had a GP who wasted his time for 4 years then told him he was imagining the pain. I googled the GP and was instantly met with complaints from feminists and the gay community where this GP asserting his “religion” went against the law here by refusing to refer women for abortions and made old testament statements against gay patients. I did not expect to find anything like that. Our doctor’s union has a well known and unspoken habit of defending these kind of peers. Some of the beliefs of the bloke make members of the Taliban look like Mr Mom.

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      • That’s one of my favorite films, Mr. Mom. Sorry Bard’s back is aching.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Coyote from Orion says:

        A few things to sort out like his back. A lot on this week. My friend in Sydney had her dog run over yesterday morning. Very sad because that animal was vital in her recovery from trauma. Had been so good to her in a world where most people want something from her. Poor little dog. I had a kangaroo jump in front of my vehicle when I was driving interstate. I felt so sad for it. A politician would have been so much better.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’m so very sorry. She must be heartbroken. Best thing, as soon as it mends enough, would be to get another…a rescue of course. You really rescue one another. So sorry.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Coyote from Orion says:

        Much to the disappointment of some there has been no pill to make me forget I had a brother or regard myself an only child. Bless you today 😇

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Coyote from Orion says:

    Charity is another industry now. We will need a qualification to be a friend to someone soon.

    Like

  4. I have many friends on that struggle. Fortunately I came from a long line of good genes too. I was at a wedding last week and you could see who belonged to my side of the family — all thin. I have a good friend who struggles. She’s on Weight Watchers but what see really wants to do is eat anything all the time. I keep trying to get her to move more and focus on other things. I will always care for her no matter what weight she is but she is not happy when she’s big.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I found a photo of myself, from my younger days, when I thought I was fat … seriously WTF was I thinking? That was before social media and just the media, in general, making young girls feel inferior for not being “perfect”. It’s a vicious cycle that is for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I went through that years ago since models were supposed to look like Twiggy. Now I really look like her with no effort. My mother always made fun of me when I was little since I was pudgy. That kind of thing scars. I’ll bet you were really cute back then. 🙂

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  6. skinnyuz2b says:

    My Pookie’s entire side of the family has extreme weight issues. So far, 12 or 13 of them have had the stomach operation to make you lose weight. My sweetie is the only one who did it with diet and exercise. Luckily, my entire side of the family got the thin gene.
    At 5’6″ and 99lbs with all my clothes on, I longed for some curves, They belatedly made an appearance in my 50s, too late to have fun with them in my teens and 20s. I’m now 126.
    Susannah, to add credence to your post, I am not happy with my body. I’ve never admitted it to anyone except here. I can handle the weight gain, although I was happiest at 117. I’m just not in shape, despite modest exercising. At almost 67 I’ve become too lazy to keep my midriff bulge at bay. We all seem to focus on our shortcomings.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. E says:

    All of the above. Also I’m told Jackie is my 6th aunt 😉 I love your quote about shoving the food, cigarette or cell phone in our mouth. Yes I have. Women and weight go all the way back to starving ourselves in a symbol of purification to one god or another. Hilda Bruch was a German (I think) psychotherapist who researched anorexia to try and figure out the root. There’s so much to it.

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  8. Eating disorders abound with young women (and men are not excluded here) and our middle daughter got caught up with it. Thank god we found out in time and she’s doing well now.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. micklively says:

    Maeve and I were sat in a pub on Sunday and caught a glimpse of Thunderball, the James Bond film from 1965, on the telly. The director missed no opportunity to parade scantily clad female flesh, as is consistent with the genre. I was struck by how natural and Rubenesque the various extras looked. I am sure most of those women would never be allowed near a film set now. It is both strange and dangerous how our standard of beauty has shifted.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I’m glad I’m a guy since we don’t have as much pressure as women in that area, but it’s still a concern. I’m more worried about the health concerns than appearances, but I think exercise is more important than weight anyway, at least for health.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Gail Kaufman says:

    I’m more obsessed with overall health than solely weight, but weight is a big part of that. Not only does excess weight increase the risk of disorders but it negatively impacts activities and mood, so it becomes a vicious cycle. Weight Watchers may help with satiety, but hunger is not the cause of obesity. It’s all the other reasons people eat that is the source of the problem.

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    • You sound like an expert. Obesity sometimes is hereditary, but more often than not, at least what I encounter, it’s obsession. They eat, they binge, they purge, they starve all the while talking of nothing else. I vicious cycle indeed.

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  12. Diabetes and people and images have led me on that merry chase to the ideal weight for many … decades. Now, I am less concerned with my midsection and more about my sugar levels. But even those seem less dependent on a diet and more dependent on diet itself. Balancing meals, treating yourself, exercising with some care, sleeping well (which I don’t do since the stoke) are all things I am looking at.
    What I do remember is being 16 and the perfect weight and nice looking and…miserable because I was so high strung, worried, and worn out (couldn’t sleep then due to stress).
    Hmmm, I may have missed something back then.
    Scott

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  13. All to the yes. Health looks so much differently than just what shows up on the scale.I love that we can be empowered through that

    Liked by 1 person

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