This involves my friend Ed who dresses like a matinee idol..impeccably stylish…treating his wardrobe with the deference due a king.
We were working together in a vast space amid many tables and chairs.
Ed had gotten up to get coffee.
I was stretching my legs, when a guy with a plate filled with eggs, sat in Ed’s chair.
It wasn’t so much that he sat there, even though twenty other seats were available, it was that he moved Ed’s hat.
Now to his credit, Ed is a very calm, collected human being, unlike myself whose fuse is the length of a nose hair, so it was no surprise, he didn’t react, and I did.
“Excuse me, someone is sitting there as you can see, by the hat you just moved.”
This ill-mannered putz with a shaved head like a cue ball, looked right through me as if I were glass.
“Did you hear me?”
“Relax. I’m eating my breakfast.”
“RELAX DID YOU SAY???” YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO MOVE SOMEONE’S BELONGINGS THE WAY YOU DID AND YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO WITH THAT TONE OF VOICE THERE PAL.”
I saw that Mr. Entitled was getting a little nervous after he dropped eggs on his lap.
I looked over at Ed who said nothing, almost pretending he didn’t know me, or his hat (gee, wonder why), quietly stirring his coffee.
I stood over the guy like a traffic cop who finally got up and sat elsewhere.
“Norma Rae: Forget it! I’m stayin’ right where I am. It’s gonna take you and the police department and the fire department and the National Guard to get me outta here!”
I then put Ed’s hat back on his chair, where it belonged, resuming my legendary cheerfulness.
Norma, that little dickens, who looks a lot like Susannah, had finally left the building.
Ed, you can come back now.