Three Naked Men

I’ve been feeding cats.

I know, you were hoping for a little porn on a sultry Sunday, but I will say, it was like having lunch with three hot, longshoremen, just with tails.

Buddy is the biggest…white and tan,   like a furry spectator pump, with paws the size of soup spoons.  You know what they say about a cat with big paws don’t you?

Then Smooch,   who, rumor has it, was Morris’s stand-in, likes to crawl on your lap sniffing your, well…he’s subtle about it, I’ll say that for him.

And last but certainly not least, we have little Plato      bringing up the rear not quite sure of his place at the table since Smooch thinks nothing of elbowing him, out of the way, stealing his share.

I had to have a stern talk with him about manners and letting the little guy go first, but he just went for my crotch again in protest.

I suppose one could think of worst things.

Men, they’re all the same.  Food, sex, chasing balls, just not neccessarily in that order.

For the first time ever, I’m actually being paid to cat-sit, a revelation in itself.  I walked Carmela the Bassett Hound, for a solid year, then Tallulah the Bishon, for another one, never for the money.  There’s such a grace showing up for an animal who shows up for you, their affection front and center, perpetually purring on your behalf.

I brought a book over called, The Library Lion, to read to them.  I know, Susannah, have you been drinking?

No, but I will say, they all sat in a row as if in a masterclass, blinking in all the right places, like when Library Lion naps in the stacks before helping the librarian restock, happy to just be in service.

What did you say Smooch? Reading really works up an appetite? Okay, I’ll tell you what…I’ll open one more can before I leave, and no, I don’t want to fool around.




About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in animals, Books, food, friendship, humor, men, New York City, readng, words, writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to Three Naked Men

  1. Awww, I bet they were the best listeners (when they weren’t eyeing up your crotch). Love the little guy.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. micklively says:

    Maybe the adage “morals of a tom cat” is well earned?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. skinnyuz2b says:

    Where do the kitties sleep, Susannah? When it was chilly, my monkey kitty started out under my comforter, next to my body. But I often woke up to her wrapped around my head like a fur hat.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Their mother has a huge king size bed they occupy. She also had a dog they’re not too thrilled with so the bedroom is their domain. She takes the dog with her so they love having the run of the apt back. I get such a kick out of them. I Should pay them. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I love this piece, Susannah. So quirky in your inimitable style. I love the image of you reading to them. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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