My friend Joanne was concerned, if I stopped going to Starbucks each morning, my stories would also stop.
Well Jo, there’s a tale on every corner here in Hitsvilles U.S.A.
I was running in the park, yes…she’s back, her leg all healed, a little slow, I mean turtles are passing me, but I’m out there in all my pokey glory.
I see two stocky men jogging in front of me, punching the air like prizefighters, so similar from the back, they look like matching sectionals that could be pushed together.
As I approach, I hear they’re having an argument over a gal named Sal.
One says, “Why do ya care about her, she’s been wit everybody. Sally ain’t no nice girl, and ya know I’m right.”
I think she’s nice,” said the other, “and pretty too, and you ain’t right, and I’m askin her out.”
“Even though she’s gone down on everything but the Titanic?”
That made me laugh, as I started to pass them, seeing, they were identical twins.
I smile over my shoulder. The one who likes Sally, smiles back, the other, does not.
“Can we help you?” said Mr. Snotty. “Like, why you smilin like that?”
“Oh, I’m happy, just to be out here. Had an injury that laid me up.”
“Yeah, I hate when that happens,” said the nice one.
“Well, have a good day,” I said, escaping quickly.
Suddenly I hear, “Hey, you married?”
“No, I mean yes,” pondering a one-two, what are ya doing later, punch.
“Oh I forget. You know how it is.”
“That ain’t good,” said Snotty. “See bro, Sally’s married, and she fa-gets too.”
Joanne, as you can see, you have nothing to worry about.