Officer Andy and Me

There was a half marathon in Central Park on Sunday knowing, if I wanted to run, I had to go early.  Finding yourself in the middle of a race that size is like running alongside buffalo.  One could say, it’s not exactly relaxing, especially when some idiot in Spandex yells, get the fuck outta the way you slow, skinny bitch.

That said.

I flew from my building at 5:45, waking the doorman who was sound asleep.


As I’m nearing the entrance to the park, I see groups of workers setting up water stations, cordoning off parts of the road with yellow tape like it was a crime scene, and for me it was, having to be this hysterical on the official day of rest.  It’s one of those Catholic rituals I still abide because, hey, it’s a great excuse for doing nothing.

I approach a police car parked on 90th and 5th.  “Excuse me Officer,” I say, through a closed window.

“Yeah,” he says, rolling it down eating a Danish.

“Could you tell me when the race is going to start…is it soon?”

He looks at his watch, then back at me and says,”11 a’clock, in Brooklyn.”

“Really, that late? You mean I could’a slept in?”

“So why didn’t ya go online and see what time? I mean, that would’a been a lot smat’a than gettin up so early, doncha think?”

“Yes, I see your point Officer, Andy is it?” Without my glasses that’s what it looked like on his blurry badge.

“Be safe,” he said, shaking his head before rolling up the window.

Cops, they bust you every time,  even if it’s just for random stupidity.


About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
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13 Responses to Officer Andy and Me

  1. At least he wished you well, in his own way.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, you might be an early bird, but you were more energetic than Pookie and me. I sat on my butt playing Blackjack and Pookie stood playing craps while we celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary. And we won!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. At least you got your run in. I try to get my Starbucks run in before local walks/runs as they close roads. Most of the time I don’t pay attention and am surprised when I see the police setting things up.


  4. I suppose it’s the difference of the job as between Middletown and Indianapolis as,. here, I think our officers would mostly say, “That information’s is online if you want to check next time.” Hmm, they don’t quite “bust” you every time here. I have gotten used to that, but still respect the badge very much; just more so when they are nice.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. micklively says:

    I doubt stupidity is on your statute book. How could the GOP survive?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I guess letting him know that weight watchers also has a convenient app would have landed you in the slammer. Haha!

    Liked by 1 person

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