There’s a young girl I see running most mornings, 30ish, curly-haired, long and lean.
She always runs along the various paths that parallel the road, like a deer loping by.
Occasionally we stretch together on one of the Park’s many bridges discussing a panoply of things like yoga and make-up…girlie topics that unite all females, no matter what age.
But not this morning. Today I found her in tears, her corkscrew curls wet, wrapped around her face.
Her family, Jews with a point of view it seems, are pressuring her into marriage, says she’s going to be an old maid soon if she doesn’t find a husband. Apparently her two sisters are both married with kids, so she’s turning into the black sheep embarrassing her parents.
My heart broke for her wanting to kill them for killing the spirit of such a lovely creature, who would love to meet Mr. Right even though they’d be happy with Mr. Wrong so they’ll look good at Temple.
“I date all the time,” she said, “It’s not that I don’t try, I just don’t like anyone enough to tie any knots.” She’s now weeping on my shoulder.
“You know Sherry, I’ll call her, it’s okay to wait for someone who feels right, and you’re so young still, believe me, there’s time.”
“Not according to my mother who says my insides are shriveling. I need to start a family…now.”
Did I want to yell at this pushy, insensitive woman who should just be happy to have such a sweet, lovely daughter with an innocence you don’t often see, making perfect sense she’s not a player, meaning, she wants the real thing, not just some male that looks good on paper.
“I’ve been on JDate, and it’s awful,” she said, the Jewish version of eHarmony. “Everything is about money, and where you went to school, and what your father does. I always feel as if I’m being interviewed for a job rather than for who I am.”
Her nose that her mother wants her to fix, is now red as a beet. She’s so pretty just the way she is. I try keeping silent, but finally burst at the seams.
“Sherry, I think it’s time you say to your parents, they’re hurting you and if they don’t stop, you’ll not see them.”
She looked at me, shocked. “How could I do that? They’d be so crushed.”
“What about you. You’re not a baby, you live on your own, you support yourself, am I right?”
She nods her curly head.
“You have rights, and for the record, I admire you for your independence and willingness to wait for what feels right. To thine own self be true, I believe you have that on one of your T-shirts.”
We both laughed. “I forgot about that. I need to wear it more.”
“Yes, to remind yourself, your feelings matter, even if those nearest you can’t understand.”
I watch as her long legs take flight thinking, one day she’ll find someone she’ll love, worthy of her.
A hunch. 
SB
Oh Susannah, I so hope she listens to her heart. Living with a spouse that doesn’t love you would be the worse form of hell. She sounds like a very sensible young woman who will replay your encouraging words to give her strength.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Let’s hope. I’m no expert but I know, if love isn’t there on the launch, boy, will you be in trouble later. Thanks Skinny, for reading. Hope you’re on the permanent mend. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Every day is better. I came home last Wed and had a luncheon for six on Mon. A childhood friend/neighbor flew in from Vancouver for three days. It had been planned months before. Pookie helped me that morning and my friends did all the lifting. I slept most of Tue.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sounds perfect, the life of a slim, trim Duchess, with extremely fine, not to mention loving, help. Glad to hear…:)
LikeLiked by 1 person
I don’t know what to say. I thought the days of pushing someone into marriage were mostly over except for some religious groups. Being in an unhappy marriage is the worst way to live.
LikeLike
Some families still think that way I’m sorry to say. They have agendas you’re supposed to follow. This young woman thinks less of herself because of her natural instincts that should be honored. Just another tale in the Naked City.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Parental approval is big. It can destroy your self-confidence if you don’t live up to expectations. I was fortunate. My mother kept her expectations low or to herself. I have to think she was disappointed that I never had children. (Damn! It was on my list!)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Those lists can be so tiring. I meant to have a Basset Hound, there might be still time…:)
LikeLiked by 2 people
What a love story — your love of people made you speak out to protect a defenseless soul! Surely your caring words will give her strength to ward off over-bearing parents.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You give me far too much credit Anne. I just can’t stand to see anyone cry.
LikeLike
You respond, Susannah. Many of us would not, for one reason or another.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I cry a lot myself so my radar is always up. Pain is much too rampant these days, for everyone. sigh
LikeLike
You have an excellent radar, and you put it to good use. I really do admire that.
LikeLike
So dig yours outta the closet and take it for a spin. It’s there behind that ball gown you never wear. 🙂
LikeLike
There’s an idea!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike
Ah, Dear Susannah, I mean Abby….
Nicely done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you
LikeLiked by 1 person
What a nice piece. That’s the lioness coming out in you, right? You’ll have to keep us updated on her in the future. I had to look up shiksa, by the way. In Korean, shiksa means “meal”. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love Yiddish. My next door neighbor is Jewish and calls me the shiksa next door. Makes me laugh. Funny it means meal in Korean. A shiksa could be one when you think about it…a main course. 🙂
LikeLike
I’m so glad to hear you gave her pause and comfort. I hope she heeds your advice, because it is quite sound in this case.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, my advice sometimes hits the ground with a thud. Tears inspire me to put in my two cents that doesn’t always make sense but…:)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Last time I checked, it was 2018. Thank goodness you and Sherry crossed paths.
In light of the increasing disconnect in this world, I think it’s time for you to conduct a “kindness/compassion” refresher course. Professor Grasshopper
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m hopping in my running shorts, making notes…:)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Of course!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike