Getting the Most Out Of Your Vacation…From the Waist Down

It’s that time of year again, when those naughty Europeans prowl in the Park, trying their darndest to get laid before going home.

How do I know they’re not locals? Because they look at you as if you’re an exotic zoo animal, like a lynx, or a zebra.

They troll the runner’s track and road on a reconnaissance mission for that quick, casual canoodle.

I suppose one in their twilight years should be flattered, like this morning when I was ogled by a fella 35 at the most, smiling like he was just hit over the head.

After looking behind me making sure to be the actual recipient of his simpering smiles, realized, it had to be me, there was no one else around at 6:00 A.M..

I’ll admit, he was quite cute with wavy d’Artagnan hair, and like any well-equipped Musketeer, had a sword, just not one you could, how you say…en guarde…right away.

“Bonjour Mademoiselle.”

Mademoiselle indeed. Well, that’s certainly one way to break the ice.

“I am Fitz from Dijon.

“Dijon did you say…any relation to the mustard?”


do you leeve’ how you say…cloose by?”

“You mean like in a tree? No. And excuse me, but I have a schedule to keep.”

Nu NuWeet, Mademoiselle...s’il vous plait, which way, how you say…Boat House?”

“We say, Boat House.”

Turns out my frisky Musketeer just needed directions to the nearest mens room.

Alright, alright…but who knows, if I hadn’t gone on my merry way, what might have happened once he unsheathed that sword.

Oh mon Dieu!

Oh my God indeed.    

🙂   SB



About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in animals, humanity, humor, men, nature, New York City, sex, words and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to Getting the Most Out Of Your Vacation…From the Waist Down

  1. skinnyuz2b says:

    An accent can get a guy quite a ways. My youngest son was adopted from Russia at age 9. When he was around 12 or 13 he said, “Mom, girls really like my accent. I’m going to try to keep it.”
    The foreign attraction goes both ways. I recall when a young girl in our office returned from Italy. What impressed her the most? The shoes the guys wore, off course, ha ha!
    I bet that debonnaire visitor did have his eye on you and simply switched his story when he realized he was striking out.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Twilight years? I think not! Sure hope he made it to the boat house!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Eilene Lyon says:

    LOL. Really should have at least gone for a coffee!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. robprice59 says:

    Speaking as a European, I can attest you are exotic, even if not a zoo animal. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Never a dull moment in the Big Apple that’s for sure. Just being addressed as Mademoiselle would’ve had me melting on the spot. I’m so easy … lol


  6. I’m sure in New York, you must see all sorts of tourists, both the good and bad. Luckily this one didn’t turn out too bad. 🙂


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