It’s early Saturday when I try entering the bank, my debit card not cooperating, when a skinny black man in army fatigues with a glass eye lets me in.
“The bank ain’t open yet,” he says, when he sees me heading to the main door.
I had some business to tend to, forgetting it’s the weekend, but think, now I’ll just use the ATM.
As I proceed to get out a fast 20, this man is suddenly next to me staring quite openly with his one good eye.
Uh-oh
Better get my New York out…quick.
“What are you lookin at,” I say, hoping he’s not about to either attack or rob me…or both, “is it my hair?”
He laughs. Good sign.
“Ah wish ma’ old lada’ had a sensa’ huma’…ya know what she wen’ and done deid’?”
I shove my card and money way inside my bag.
“No, what?” I say, aiming for the door.
“She fight with me all night, just cause ah wuz’ a leetle’ drunk.”
Run Susannah, run, but no, instead say, “Well, maybe next time you can have a little coffee before you go home, so you’re not so drunk.”
“But then I’ll lose ma’ buzz, and what’s da’ use in drinkin’ then.”
“Didn’t you lose your buzz fighting with your wife?”
He thinks about this for a second.
“Ah see what youes’ gettin’ at.”
“Nice you have a wife,” I say, as I scoot out the front door as another man comes in.
Whew!
SB
Maybe youse talked some sense into him, but I doubt it, ha ha! At least he saw your point and might think about a cup of coffee before going home. Thanks for sharing this encounter. I enjoyed the conversation and your excellent storytelling.
I wonder what happened to his eye.
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It had a Sammy Davis Jr. thing going on, is all I know. How it never moves even though the other one does. I’m the only one I know who would have spoke to him. It’s hard for me to just ignore someone because they’re down on their luck, or coming off a bender. My dad was like that. He’d carry on over something that made little sense. sigh
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Baffle them with logic! Sometimes it’s gives you just enough time to get away!
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He seemed harmless but ya just never know. Of course when I think of some of the men I’ve dated that ended up being certifiable, my judgemnt does come into question…:)
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You are older and wiser now so your instinct is top notch.
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Let’s hope.
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Your New York smarts come in handy. If I lived in the city, I’d love to have you for a bodyguard. Don’t worry; I’m not moving.
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Love your new picture. Very glam.
I’m a New Yorker through and through. It’s the only place where I feel safe. Take me into say, Connecticut, and I’m shakin’ like a leaf…:)
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My pic — should look healthy, because I just walked a mile in cold weather.
If you shook while here in NC, we could protect you. Best would be our son who can speak like a mountain man.
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Didn’t know you had a son. How nice is that. 🙂
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The girls are in Denmark and NJ. John $ has lived near Asheville for ten years or so. We would house-hunt when we came to visit him. He tends to be quiet when he meets people, and before you know it, they have told him their life stories. Maybe it’s because he listens so well that he can slip into a mountain accent without noticing it himself.
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Sounds like a writer, like his mom.
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I know a fair number of people who could write really well and don’t ever do it.
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I guess you have to want to and passionately, since it can be lonely. I love to write more than anything and only feel myself when in the throes though never painfully. A gift. 🙂
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I totally agree with you. I would rather write than sleep or eat.
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There’s a T-shirt I sent to my friend David, also a writer and a teacher that said across the front…eat…sleep…write. He calls it his lucky shirt.
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That sounds like the perfect shirt for your friend David.
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He wears it when he writes, like a cotton totem. 🙂
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Your psychologing (my word, but oh well) with the guy made me laugh out loud. You could do streetside counseling if you wanted to, although I wouldn’t recommend it. 🙂
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Yes, maybe he has a cardboard box he sleeps in now and then I can borrow as a desk. You’re so funny.
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I have had those types of situations. Never pleasant. I know there is a reason and that it all works out in the end, but I can seldom figure it out.
Scott
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I’m laughing at “is it my hair?” I’ll have to remember that since I’m also a magnet to one-eyed Sammy Davis look-alikes who need counseling at the ATM … hahahaha!
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I often say that also to dogs who bark at me. 🙂
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