Is Your Glass Eye Half Full Or…

 It’s early Saturday when I try entering the bank, my debit card not cooperating, when a skinny black man in army fatigues with a glass eye lets me in.

“The bank ain’t open yet,” he says, when he sees me heading to the main door.

I had some business to tend to, forgetting it’s the weekend, but think, now I’ll just use the ATM.

As I proceed to get out a fast 20, this man is suddenly next to me staring quite openly with his one good eye.

Uh-oh

Better get my New York out…quick.

“What are you lookin at,” I say, hoping he’s not about to either attack or rob me…or both, “is it my hair?”

He laughs. Good sign.

“Ah wish ma’ old lada’ had a sensa’ huma’…ya know what she wen’ and done deid’?”

I shove my card and money way inside my bag.

“No, what?” I say, aiming for the door.

“She fight with me all night, just cause ah wuz’ a leetle’ drunk.”

Run Susannah, run, but no, instead say, “Well, maybe next time you can have a little coffee before you go home, so you’re not so drunk.”

“But then I’ll lose ma’ buzz, and what’s da’ use in drinkin’ then.”

“Didn’t you lose your buzz fighting with your wife?”

He thinks about this for a second.

“Ah see what youes’ gettin’ at.”

“Nice you have a wife,” I say, as I scoot out the front door as another man comes in.

Whew!

SB

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About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in alcohol, Fashion, humanity, humor, men, New York City, words and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to Is Your Glass Eye Half Full Or…

  1. skinnyuz2b says:

    Maybe youse talked some sense into him, but I doubt it, ha ha! At least he saw your point and might think about a cup of coffee before going home. Thanks for sharing this encounter. I enjoyed the conversation and your excellent storytelling.
    I wonder what happened to his eye.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It had a Sammy Davis Jr. thing going on, is all I know. How it never moves even though the other one does. I’m the only one I know who would have spoke to him. It’s hard for me to just ignore someone because they’re down on their luck, or coming off a bender. My dad was like that. He’d carry on over something that made little sense. sigh

      Like

  2. Baffle them with logic! Sometimes it’s gives you just enough time to get away!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Your New York smarts come in handy. If I lived in the city, I’d love to have you for a bodyguard. Don’t worry; I’m not moving.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Your psychologing (my word, but oh well) with the guy made me laugh out loud. You could do streetside counseling if you wanted to, although I wouldn’t recommend it. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I have had those types of situations. Never pleasant. I know there is a reason and that it all works out in the end, but I can seldom figure it out.
    Scott

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m laughing at “is it my hair?” I’ll have to remember that since I’m also a magnet to one-eyed Sammy Davis look-alikes who need counseling at the ATM … hahahaha!

    Liked by 1 person

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