The Salvation Army’s army of Santas, are already out, ringin’ their noble bells.
My own Santa on the corner is quite charming. A cross between Will Smith, Bozo and a game show host, plus he sings, and he’s good too, crooning My Girl, by The Temptations, sliding into, We Need a Little Christmas, from the Broadway show Mame. An actor, no doubt, paying the rent.
I see him at least 3 times a day never failing to be asked for a contribution. I finally said, if I give the Salvation Army any more money, I’ll have to ask them for a loan.
“Oh, you’re not foolin’ me,” said Santa. “I know all about you East Side girls. You just don’t wanna dig into that trust fund a’ yours.”
I wish.
This brings me to yesterday. As I got off the train, there he was in his usual spot, ringing his bell, belting out a tune, when a pretty young girl in front of me, flips around like a flapjack in embossed leather and screams, “YOU WHISTLIN’ AT ME?”
It took a second but then realized, she was speaking to Santa.
Not missing a beat, his white teeth gleaming like a Pepsodent ad said, “I just couldn’t help myself, you’re so damned beautiful, you just make me wanna ring my bell.”
“I’LL RING YO BELL, I’LL RING IT SO HARD YO’LL GET A FUCKIN NOSE BLEED.”
What a great line, I thought, write that down Susannah, quick….write it down.
As she left like a gazelle on steroids, I looked over at Santa who I’m guessing, won’t be whistling anytime soon. 
🙂
SB
Santa got game! I’m so old school that I remember being flattered when someone whistled.
This time of year I keep lots of ones handy for those ringers. My Pookie and his two brothers each take a turn ringing the bell. They aren’t actors, but are certainly entertaining. Lots of impromptu dancing and singing. No standing still with stoic ringing. Their father used to do it and got them into it.
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So far it’s been warm, but some days, you need to feel for them being out there. Yeah, a whistle or two wouldn’t bother me too much either. Oh well…
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She was feisty wasn’t she? I like upbeat Santas. They make you donate more!
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Just a guess here…she was having a bad day?
Scott
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Could be.
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I think the hardest thing about being an SA Santa is hearing that bell ring for hours on end. Good for him for singing and mixing it up, although it may be abusing his position to be whistling at girls during it. 🙂 Sounds like he was getting on that girl’s last nerve.
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I think a guy in a Santa suit in the middle of the afternoon is pretty harmless. She may need a little more fiber in her diet or maybe she has low blood sugar. Could also have been all that leather she was wearing. Glad it didn’t come with a whip and a chair or Santa would be on sick leave. 🙂
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We can’t win! You all want to look pretty and be admired, but the moment that admiration is expressed in an “unapproved” manner, you go all Radio Rental. If you can’t trust Santa……….
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It all depends what’s going on beneath Santa’s suit, if you get my drift Mick. That snappy lady’s antenna was sure up. 🙂
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Radio Rental and antennae go well together. 😉
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Nice set of woids…:)
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NYC has the best Salvation Santas on the planet. That girl needs to calm the hell down. There will come a day when “whistles from Sants” will be on here damn wish list.
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You betcha. No Santa is whistlin’ at me, I can tell ya that.
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