It’s Christmas Eve. I’m standing on the corner across from Whole Foods deciding if I have the tolerance to go in or not, knowing, it will be crawling with cooks and guests of theirs bringing dessert.
I think, perhaps my modest needs can wait.
Already missing three green lights, a construction worker, the type you could see running out of a burning building with a kid under each arm, has been standing near me eating a variety of edibles. A big guy in coveralls with a hardhat strapped to his waist, it’s as if he has an endless buffet set up in those massive, industrial pockets. After a sandwich, some type of cheese and an apple that crunches like an axe, he pulls out a lavish pastry.
I guess I’m staring because he stops, displaying dimples that I can swear, wink, and says, “Wanna split it?”
I’m rarely at a loss for words nor surprised at anything that I encounter, but he had me, as I burst out laughing and say, “It’s okay. You’re obviously very hungry.”
And he says, “Nah, it’s just a snack.” 🙂
SB
Susannah, too bad you didn’t have him hoist you up on a shoulder and carry you across the street.
One of my husband’s brothers was that way. Always pulling random food out of pockets. He once produced a McDonald’s cheeseburger while they were in the middle of nowhere on a job. We referred to him as the food magician.
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He was a foodie alright, and unabashedly so. So many stories Skinny. One can say, on every corner. 🙂
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And you didn’t take him up on it? Gosh!
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Will power. After a half I would have been off to the races.
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But you would have had a new best friend! A nice burly friend is good.
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He was the size of Guliver.
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and you were a munchkin!
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Petite. Could’a fit in one of those pockets…:)
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That story is priceless. I laughed at your “modest needs” at the grocery store. If you’d seen our cart while both grandsons were here, you might have called our needs “immodest”.
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Table for one? I eat like a monk. And I’m spoiled because I buy meals daily. So I can eat what I really want. I did have eggs so we scrambled, we did. 🙂
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LOL! I’m so glad you are not hard-boiled!
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Hah. My eggs, no matter how they start out, end up scrambled. I finally stopped asking guests how they’d like their eggs. 🙂
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I can understand the standard scrambled egg offering. I don’t poach on other people’s territory..
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You need to write these down. So you don’t have egg on your face. 🙂
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I might coddle you if I write them down.
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I’ll try not to egg you on. 🙂
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I know when I’m beaten.
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I can’t scramble, poach, coddle or beat that.:)
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When she was tired, my mother used to say, “I’m whipped.”
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I understand but, I’ve heard it said, to make an omelette you’ve got to break a few eggs. 🙃
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That’s not all it’s cracked up to be.
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Please forgive my late reply, but after being out all day, I was fried.
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Better fried than be-deviled.
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We’re shootin’ for sunny side up…:)
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You win! Happy New Year!
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I don’t win. You are the Queen of Wordplay, and don’t you forget it. Happy New Year Anne. I like that you and Anne Lamott spell it the same way. 🙂
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Anne is a much more balanced spelling, though it doesn’t guarantee the person wearing it is balanced. But then, you knew that.
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You underestimate yourself. Look how funny and clever you are. Not everyone can say that Anne, with an e.
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I am forever miffed at the dietary laws that get broken on a regular basis. I top off at five to seven pounds- holiday weight gain coupled with my annual running hiatus- after which I redistribute the wealth by getting back to running and more sensible choices at meal time. If I were to put on, say, twenty pounds? I sure as hell better be reprising the role of Jake La Motta. Otherwise, I’d be a basket case.
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I think some bird, a cardinal maybe who would look chic on the cover, should write a book. You rarely see a fat bird. They all look like trainers that fly. I just got up. I may revise this after coffee. 🙃
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Trainers that fly . . I love that! No revisions will be necessary, SB.
If humans possessed the ability to fly, I doubt it would result in a thinner population. More to the truth, you’d simply have a bunch of overweight peeps with arms cut like diamonds . . .
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Good point.
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To me everything requires a rewrite. Even a shopping list.
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You’re a tough cookie. Thorough as well.
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I had “snacks” like those most of my early life – and – diabetes, overweight, and a craving for sugar and carbs…lol
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There was a time I lived on donughts and milk, quite happily. There’s a line from the West Wing…as a kid you eat Tupperware. Yup.
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How could you resist dimples that wink?
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Practice. 🙃
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He he he!
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Dimples, food & a smile? Can you hear my heart pounding up there in the big apple? That combo is better than any cologne on the market.
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So that’s what that is…thump thump…:)
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