You Look Tired…Are You Tired?

Yes, I’m tired of you saying, I look tired.

She’s my neighbor on 12 I’m very nice to…leave notes, that seasonal bouquet, and in return, I’m examined like a Chevy that any minute will get her tires kicked.

I almost forgot, she’s 92. I soothe myself with one word…cataract, mistaking me for an owl, one with high cheekbones.

Then there’s the 31 year-old down the hall who I’ll hide from if I see her door starting to open.


Did you dye your hair? Looks lighter.

Did you dye your hair? Looks darker.

Did you lose weight? You’re looking fragile.

Did you gain weight? You seem a little heavier.

How I long to ask, what’s it like having only one brain cell? Must be like traveling light, with just a carry-on.

Why must people comment when it’s so rude…did I mention it’s very rude?

If you had two heads, at most I’d say hello twice, never alluding to anything out of the norm.

If you invited me into your home, I’d never you own? Do you rent? How much do you pay?

I’d douse my head, the only one I have I’m happy to say, in the sink before I was…


The audacity of inappropriate questioning leaves me in a Connecticut swoon. My mother, with all her faults, taught me manners, to refrain from being too nosy about things that are none of your business. Of course part of that was to keep a low profile, in case you got caught canoodling with a husband who wasn’t yours, but still.

The rule is, if you do not wish to be interrogated, you do not interrogate.

Decorum, that in 10 years will have a show at the Met, sounds like a hot new club.

Politeness trumps presumption. I know, someone should mention this to Donald Trump, but we’ll save that for another day.

Unknown-1.jpeg Like shooting mice in a barrel.







About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in Connecticut, Culture, humanity, humor, New York City, Politics, travel, words and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

52 Responses to You Look Tired…Are You Tired?

  1. robprice59 says:

    Folk are nosy, interested, concerned, habitual, and struggling to find something interesting or original to say. Better any of these than they just ignore you? Of course, there will be times when you’d prefer to be ignored, but how are the rest of us to discern where you’re at?
    When I moved to Singapore, it took me a while to get used to people asking me whether I’d eaten. Then I realised, it’s just their version of “how are you?”.
    In Lincolnshire, the standard greeting is “now then”. It takes all sorts to make a world!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Sorryless says:


    I’m with you on this. I do think there’s a line between showing interest in someone and being nosy. I engage people I know in conversation based on what I know about them. And this always brings a sparkle to their eyes. Like “How’s your sister doing, is she better?” or “How was your son’s graduation ceremony?”. It’s funny how I can’t remember something I did five minutes ago, but I remember little tidbits about someone’s life. They like it. I like that they like it. No harm and no foul.

    But to go beyond that is absurd. As I would never be like “How’s your sister doing? Is she better? And did her husband stick around?”. . . uh, no.

    You’re right, some people take it to another level. Not a fan.

    Decorum as a club name . . I concur.

    Two heads means two hellos? I would do that too! LOL.

    And “trump” has been Trumped by Trump!

    Have a wonderful Monday, Susannah. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. aFrankAngle says:

    Cheers to politeness and decorum. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I am appalled at the lack of manners these days. Having grown up in the South, I saw good manners lived, not mandated. It has probably changed now, but I have good memories. As to your neighbors, I cringe with you when you write of them.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Patricia says:

    Not too many peeps around here that kick tires. Most just say hello and ask how are you. I am not bothered by rude folks. Don’t like to waste my energy on them. Then there is the fact that I don’t hear as well as I used to so maybe I’m not hearing the rudeness?

    Liked by 2 people

    • You’re so funny. I loved what you wrote yesterday. That Lincoln quote is a favorite of mine and wish I had included it in my Favorite Quotes post.

      I’m very sensitive, to a fault, so that unexpected pounce bothers me. I’ve gotten better but, the random barrage of remarks always feels like an assault.

      You’re kind to write. Thanks. Purrs to Teddy and Jack, the coolest cats I know. 🙂


  6. skinnyuz2b says:

    Susannah, we all know exactly what you’re talking (writing) about. The clones of the rudenick are rampant. My guess is that it stems from a sense of insecurity and/or jealousy and due to constant repetition becomes habit. My thought is that they wish they could switch bodies with you!
    A co-worker (in a different department) from many moons ago, was a few years younger but looked a bit older. Her constant refrain to me was, “Have you been sick? You don’t look so good.” I have the displeasure of running into her every few years and she still shows the same thoughtful concern for my health. I used to just tell her I was fine. I once tried adding ‘Why would you ask?’ and immediately regretted it as she began listing items. A few years ago, at my last encounter I responded, “I’m great, but I was just about to ask you the same question. Are you okay?” The look she gave me could turn angles to stone. Our husbands were at our sides, so she didn’t say what she was thinking. I’ll see if I get the same question when we bump into each other again.

    Liked by 2 people

    • It’s like a tic they can’t control. I’m from the Church of…if you can’t say something nice…shut the hell up. Zip that lip. Have you been sick? Sick of you looking for something to pick on. The last time I visited the 31 year-old, she like a list of crimes said…did you know there’s a spot on you shirt and a run in your stocking. And could that be something in your teeth? Don’t you floss? All in one breath. I excused myself, said I had forgotten to make a call. Last time I visited or had her over. It’s too bad because I do like her two kids. Oh well.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Dale says:

    I don’t know when it became okay to make such rude comments. It drives me batty. I’m with Marc, on this one. If you can remember something about someone, ask about that; if not, a simple hello will do.
    The “you went on vacation at such and such? That must have been expensive!” I usually manage to respond with something like. “You think?” or better yet “I had the time of my life.”
    I’m getting pretty good and ignoring the rude question completely.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I used to get that a lot in Korea since there it’s not considered (as) rude. I had different people in the same day ask if I had gained weight and if I had lost weight. I’m pretty sure I had done neither. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Since my stroke, I tend to “Speak first” often followed by “I am sorry. That was my stroke.” It is usually a question that, perhaps, i should not have asked. On the other hand, my general comment is, “ask away, but be ready for the truth, cuz that’s what you will get.” I play hard on truth and don’t care much who hears it.

    Liked by 1 person

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