I’m on the train once again, when a girl in her 30s? 40s? clearly an addict, is methodically asking for money.
Now, I don’t carry cash during the day, because by the time I get home, it’s gone, given away to the various needy souls one encounters in their travels.
Just the two minute walk from my house to the subway, I pass four on the street, and two more inside the terminal.
Asking for help is pretty chronic as they wallpaper the streets, and though many are scammers, many, alas, are not.
But back to the present. This woman of an undetectable age due to her addiction, is a junkie of the worse kind since she no longer even tries to hide it, her skinny arms as they grab onto the overhead straps, showing fresh tracks that will need replenishing soon enough.
No one pays much attention to her, since the upper crust, cozy in their seats, feel little charity toward drug addicts considering it an over indulgence over a sickness.
I see it differently being somewhat of an addict myself, that only by the grace of God, didn’t get that far out of hand.
As usual I have no money, but do have a bottle of Evian in my bag, I gently offer to her. I’ve learned to proceed cautiously because sometimes if it’s not money, they get mad. Had a woman toss coffee back at me once when I offered it instead of cash.
Despite her condition, her pants falling, hair in tangled disarray, she demurely accepts it.
It was then I see who she is, or sadly used to be, as a beatific smile shoots across her face.
How beautiful, remnants of a time when drugs had yet to steal the best of her.
“Thank you, thank you,” she says, as she floats, like an apparition, down the car.
I feel sad, holding back my emotions till I’m off the train, tearing up, wrapped in humility knowing…
coming from where I do, going through all I’ve been through, that could have so easily have been me.
I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves.
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