Best Story of the Week…May 1st

I’m in line at Whole Foods, 7 a.m. sharp.

Those of us, 55 and over get to shop before the store opens at 8.

We’re patiently standing on our marks, 6 feet apart on heavy strips of gaffer’s tape they’ve laid onto the sidewalk in front of the store.

Masked and bagged, we amble up, like a breadline, while a security guard lets 8 people in at a time.

When it’s my turn he looks at me and says, “Excuse me, may I see your ID?”

I’m startled, since as far as I can see, I’m the only one he’s asked.

“Do you think I’m not old enough?”

“I just wanna be sure,” he says.

“Really? I say, as if I just won the car. “Really?” I say again.

The woman behind me says, “Oh for crying out loud, hurry up. Show him your damned license already.”

“I’m sorry,” I say, “I’m just excited that he thinks I’m younger.”

“Well nobody’s gettin’ any younger, standin’ in this line.”

The security guard looks at me and says, “I’m sorry Miss, it’s okay, you can go right in.”

“You called me Miss?” I say, smiling like a Rose Bowl Queen, “you just made my day, my year even.”

I smile at the woman behind me, now whirling passed, who shakes her head and says, “Next time I’ll make sure I’m in front’a you.”

Miss, still on her white cloud says, “Okay, see ya then. Have a nice day,” scampering up the escalator like a gushing 16 year-old.Β Β  images-1.jpeg

SB πŸ™‚


About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Thanks.
This entry was posted in Culture, food, Health, humanity, humor, New York City, women, words, writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

82 Responses to Best Story of the Week…May 1st

  1. robprice59 says:

    Proof, like I said, you’ve still got it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. skinnyuz2b says:

    Yes, you little gamine, did he call you Audrey? Unexpected compliments like that resonate for a long time. You should bring him a cookie next time you go, ha ha!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. aFrankAngle says:

    Good Morning, Miss. Thanks for the morning smile.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Dale says:

    Now how could that NOT make your day? And Mrs. Sourpuss is just a jealous cranky old bat. Goes with that whole women should uplift each other instead of crushing each other.
    Stay up on that cloud, Susannah! The lining is particularly silvery today!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. kingmidget says:

    Congratulations on winning the lottery!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Vasca says:

    WooHoo…that’s enough to put squiggle in your wiggle. A girl can float a long time on those lines! Way to go Miss. Charming.


  7. A delightful experience, Susannah. We all need those sometimes. 😁

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Sorryless says:


    This is where I would say something along the lines of “You still got it sistah”. But for the fact that uh uh . . nope. You didn’t lose it in the first place! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Eilene Lyon says:

    This one’s so good I laughed all through, then shared it with hubby and laughed all through again as I read it out loud. Even better the second time!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. In similar situations, my response is often: “No, I am really younger than I look.” The clerks have to stop and think…and then we all laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. That guys a smooth talker. πŸ™‚ I’m always happy when people think I’m in my 30s.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Hahaha! I wasn’t carded when I was a minor. Somehow being tall at 18 meant you were 21. Now, if I need an antihistamine, a minor is carding me.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.