John Waters wrote a book called, Mr Know it All.
I could easily pen the sequel…Miss Know it All since, I too think I’m always right.
For instance, the first time I saw the giant blow-up rat perched on the back of a flat truck parked in front of a building, thought it was a Disney promotion.
It’s what the Teamsters do to shame a company when hiring nonunion workers.
Donald Trump does not wear a toupee. I would tell people that he did, since, why else would his hair look that way?
Catfish have ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with an actual cat. Yeah, I did think in my youth, it was some poor stray pan fried, served with coleslaw, fries and tartar sauce.
When a woman is referred to as stacked, it has nothing to do with her poker game.
I read, therefore believed, eating cheese before bed will give you nightmares, hence, no pizza for me after 5.
I’m Italian. Talk about post traumatic stress disorder, my Mozzarella light blinking.
Bats are not blind, it’s not why they fly in your window by mistake.
Kim Kardashian did not have an ass transplant.
Eating oysters, if you’re just not in the mood, will not turn you into Mae West. When I think of all those I reluctantly slurped, while waiting for my libido to launch.
Cary Grant is not buried in Grant’s Tomb. I was a kid when I thought this, not realizing he was still alive, as well as when my mother said, I better keep an eye on Barbie and Ken so they didn’t fool around…as shrink number 33 said…
that’s all the time we have for today Susannah…so will that be cash, or a check???