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Drunk, Naked and 16
Hey God, wake the fuck up please, and help this kid?
This entry was posted in alcohol, Faith, Family, Home, kids, New York City, parents, religion, words and tagged addiction, bad parenting, Columbine, Findingmyselfthroughwriting.com, teenagers. Bookmark the permalink.
Such a sad thing…this 16 year old careening down the street drunker than a skunk, pants tripping along with him! I raised four sons, all in their teens at the same time while their dad was off soldiering. I was the ‘Lone Ranger’ and guard dog for those boys. They called me ‘the Gestapo;…lovingly I might add. Back in that day there was a PSA on TV…”It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your children are”? This mom made it her business knowing where her four were. It took lots of work but it was worth it. Thanks for posting this.
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I remember that advertisement, if you will. Things have changed I’m afraid. Four sons. WOW!!! An heir and a spare, twice. 🙂
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That is such a sad precursor for his future. And with high-schools going online he won’t even have the intervention of teachers. Much sadder is the fact that you are probably the only one to look at him with empathy and not disgust.
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I have a soft spot for all kids, after being one who bumped into walls at the speed of light. And you’re right, parents need to be more vigilant with what’s going on. Your Teacher’s Light is blinking Skinny, along with your parental one. 🙂
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I love this! Again, as an inner city teacher, I see and hear the worst I’ve been doing this almost 20 years and I’m still stunned some days and speechless. I still don’t get it. I have two kids, and I couldn’t dream of what you witnessed ever happening to them. Smh 🤦🏻♀️
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Being a teacher I’m sure influences you being a mom, and vice versa. One needs to be present, have eyes in back of their heads, and the kids need to know it. Boundaries are very comforting. Like knowing, you can’t swim out too far.
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Absolutely. There’s has to be boundaries. Too often parents want to be their child’s friend for what ever reason. Not in my house. There’s a firm line. And I sleep well at night knowing my kids will likely turn out to be good humans one day. Hopefully. 🙏🏻
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Sounds like they already are. 🙂
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Again, as a teacher in an inner city school, i have seen and heard it all. But I still continue to be shocked. I don’t get it either it. And it’s only getting worse. It’s amazing the lack of parenting that exists. I could never imagine those children in your story ever happening to my kids. smh
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I live in a very opulent part of town where too much of everything is the call of the day. Kids are entitled, arrogant and feel the rules don’t apply to them, and their parents are so mired in their privileged lives, they just can’t keep up. It’s not an excuse, just a sad explanation. Think Kennedys, and you’ll understand what I mean.
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Such a sad beginning to life. Your prayer is perfect. I would extend it to “World wake the fuck up.”
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Yeah, let’s rewrite the prayer. sigh
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😊
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I grew up in a home full of rules. My parents had four kids in five years — I think the rules were how my mom dealt with that kind of madness. As a parent myself, I wasn’t quite as rule-bound, but to this day, I still believe that rules and supervision are key to being a parent.
I’m of the firm opinion that nothing good usually happens after midnight. I have a good friend whose daughter is about to enter her senior year of high school. We were on a zoom call a couple of weekends ago. It was 5:00 p.m. This friend disappeared for a few minutes and when she came back, she said “Becky just woke up and I thought I should get her breakfast before I start to make dinner.” Yes, her daughter stays up so late every night that she sleeps until 4:00 or 5:00 in the afternoon. True, she is at home in this era of the pandemic, but still — even at home, nothing good happens after midnight. And I just want to shake my friend and say, “don’t let her do this!!!”
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Maybe you can GENTLY speak to your friend. Tact is an art, I know, but yeah, that doesn’t sound right. Establishing a normal routine, even if has to be recreated, is the best way to deal with what’s going on. Kids need boundaries. It’s for their own good, now and when they leave the nest since then they’ll know how to behave around others who may not have any. I’ll bet you’re a super father. A hunch.
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I was all about the routine with my kids. And when they went off to college, they both rebelled against the concept of a routine and failed miserably. Both of them. But I did what I could. 😉
But it’s just so strange how a lot of parents just kind of stop parenting right when their kids really need guidance, help, and role modeling the most.
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I’m not a parent, but was a wild kid because my own were not available. I needed discipline and care. They go hand in hand.
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Most children, in the absence of parental supervision, are going to get into trouble. It’s kind of inherent. It is the rare kid who does the right thing consistently if there aren’t adults or parents around to guide them.
But you turned out kind of okay, right? 😉
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I’m a decent human being, if that’s what you mean. But I stumbled a lot, and might have had an easier time with a little guidance. All moot.
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We do the best we can as parents and still, this can be not enough or can – depends on the kids. You try to instill good values, teach them well and then hope and pray some of it sinks in.
It’s easy to judge the parents when we see a kid like this stumbling all over himself but we don’t know if he snuck out, don’t know if the parents are out searching for him. It’s way too easy to judge from afar.
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Well, I guess you just bitch slapped me for my quick judgement. You’re right. I really don’t know the circumstances.
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Totally NOT my intention! I apologize.
I just know that there are times where no matter what I try to teach mine, they will do what THEY will.
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Teens are crafty. Our son went out his window onto the garage and climbed down a tree after we went to bed. We did the best we could, but we couldn’t be everywhere all the time. One amusing comfort — the police told him his manners were much too good for him to be where he was.
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And he turned out alright, despite all that tree climbing. 🙂
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He made harmful choices in his early teens. Drinking, smoking, and drugs have scarred him so that life will always be a struggle. We love him deeply, but we were not able to save him from himself.
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I’m sorry Anne, I didn’t know all that when I said what I said. Addiction is powerful, I could lecture on it. Very hard to fight. My heart opens since, as a mother it had, and continues to be, hard for you. sigh
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I knew you would understand. Most of the time we skim along the surface of life, not talking about the difficult times. It gives the impression of a fairy tale life, where everything has a happy ending. Thankfully, this story hasn’t ended, and there is always hope. I really appreciate your insightful comment. You are a true friend.
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I’m your biggest fan, well, one of many, I’m sure, and I know from personal experience how powerful any addiction is, whether it be alcohol drugs, or even food. It’s like trying to tame a tidal wave. My dad died from it, my mother abused the world because of it. Hope, yes, is the only emotion as strong.
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That is a wonderful analogy — trying to control an addiction is like trying to tame a tidal wave. You had a much earlier exposure to it than I did. The fallout is devastating. It is truly amazing that you survived and that you help so many people. I am one of your true fans, too.
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It goes either way, but I, like your son, certainly had my moments. I’ve managed…one day at a time…to stay alcohol and opiate free, but to speak for him and many others, it’s not easy. Alcoholism and drug dependence is a disease like any other. I learned that in Al-Anon. The understanding of it, opened my heart towards my parents, especially my father. Hope and grace are always ours for the taking Madam Anne. 🙂
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I know staying clean is not easy, but it bears repeating endlessly. I need to hear it, because I have not experienced it myself. Hope and grace — miraculous gifts that I believe come from God.
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You might benefit from an Al-Anon meeting. I can’t say enough how it’s helped me to understand the disease of alcoholism that if you don’t get out of the way, kills everything in its path, including you. It cares for nothing but its own need to replenish itself. It’s one of the reasons Alcoholic Anonymous is so respected, because sobriety is nothing short of miraculous, like Lazarus emerging from the tomb.
I know how hard it’s had to be for you to watch someone you love repeatedly stumble and fall, but trust me when I say, there’s hope within the ruins. Your Friend
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That’s a most encouraging message. Thank you.
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Hope I didn’t say too much. Thinking of you.
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You always say the perfect thing in the best way. I really appreciate your care and concern. You are the best!
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I’m pawing the ground with my foot.
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Toss your mane as well. Wait. Your hair is too short for that.
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PS If you read my latest confession, you’ll see how, even now, it still lurks.
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Yes, I see that. I wish addiction was not such an insidious thing.
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I always thought it was a mere indulgence. It may start that way but with time becomes a whole other animal.
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A demonic animal, I understand.
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Despite its meaning, I’ve always liked the sound of demonic. I see little imps, with horns.
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Mine are red. What color are yours?
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A pale pink. 🙂
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Your imps are PASTELing about.
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They’re in the PINK alright.
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I RED your comment. I won’t yell high; I’ll YELLOW.
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To see someone like that at one of their lowest points makes my heart go out to them since we’ve all been our lowest point, even if it’s not the same place, and everyone needs compassion sometimes. Maybe that moment was what he needed to clean himself up. Hopefully, at least.
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Haven’t seen him since. Rich kids, they’re blessed and quite often doomed by their privilege. He looked like a Park Avenue boy. They have everything but earned character, hence, stimulants that take its place. It’s sad. Perhaps I’m assuming too much, but I’ve witnessed let’s say, a little too much. On the brighter side, it could all change in a New York minute, as the saying goes.
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My kids didn’t have a chance to sneak around with Columbo as their mother. Been there done that kiddies…lol!
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I just saw ya in a trench coat.
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