New Deli

My friend who owns a gourmet shop gave me upon request, a modest slice of grilled eggplant that, after eating it, made me look like a pylon who swallowed a rat, the button to my jeans popping after telling me, there was no salt. 

NEXT DAY…

“Anthony, remember that eggplant you gave me?”

He nods while chomping on a baguette. 

“You did say, there was no salt, right?…

He doesn’t answer…chomp chomp. 

I’m only asking because, I think there was, and quite a bit as a matter of fact.”

“What’s your point?” he asks, with his mouth full. 

“My point is, if someone had high blood pressure, or a heart condition, it wouldn’t be good for them.”

“Do you have high blood pressure?”

“No.”

“Then shut up and have some toast.”

Our respective Italian now goes toe-to-toe. 

“Anthony, you can’t say your food has no salt if it does. That’s false advertising, plus these people trust you when you tell them something, like all you sell is organic.”

“What are you, Miss vegetable now? I’m running a business.”

“Well that doesn’t give you the right to lie or to make your workers lie.”

“My workers don’t lie.” 

“Is that why Arturo is doctoring up the bean salad?”

“It gets limp overnight.” 

“Apparently, that’s not the only thing.” 

What happened next? 

He kicked me out of the store, without coffee. 

SB

 

 

 

About Susannah Bianchi

I'm just a girl who likes to write slightly on slant. I've had a career in fashion, dabbled in film and to be honest, I don't like talking about myself. Now my posts are another matter so I will let them speak for themselves. My eBooks, A New York Diary, Model Behavior: Friends For Life and Notes From A Working Cat can be found on Amazon.com. Thanks.
This entry was posted in Culture, food, friendship, Health, humanity, humor, men, New York City, Women and men, words, writing and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

60 Responses to New Deli

  1. Dale says:

    You were right to call him on it. It could be dangerous for allergies, blood pressure, whatever ailments a person has who must be careful… His attitude sucks.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sorryless says:

    This is the kind of exchange that could only happen in NYC. Nothing against every other place in the world, but it’s the way the city’s pulse does its business. And who’s to say you didn’t just change his mind? And the menu with this tiff? Hell, he owes you more than coffee if so . . .

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Using the word “limp” always gets me thrown out of places. I think you were right to call him on the salt. I’m not too fond of it when my body does the puffer belly after a sodium hit. Hell, I can get my holster belt into my comfortable notch when that happens.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Patricia says:

    It is unethical to answer a question with what you know to be a lie. Did he really kick you out of the place? Doesn’t sound like he knows much about good business.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you for going to bat for those who might get hurt by his food. Golly! What an attitude!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. robprice59 says:

    I hate all advertising with a passion. Society seems to regard it as benign. I say it is EVIL! They undermine self-worth, deliberately mislead, sell unattainable life-styles, appeal to the very basest of instincts, spread discontent, and manipulate our fears and phobias; all apparently with impunity. Why do we allow it?

    Liked by 1 person

  7. skinnyuz2b says:

    Are you kicked out for good or just for the day? I don’t think I’d be too quick to return. More surprising than his lie is his reaction when you called him on it. He didn’t seem to have a clue as to why you had a problem.
    Visualize me sitting here shaking my head.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve known him a long time so he felt attacked by me, even though he knew I was right, and I guess perhaps I didn’t need to carry on so. I don’t have to eat his food and frankly, now I’m betting they all do that, all the specialty stores because, unless you’re like me who has trained herself to not like it, most people can’t eat nor enjoy saltless food, especially at Madison Avenue prices. Next time I’ll zip my lip and mind my own business which in this case would be…no more eggplant. 🙂

      Like

      • skinnyuz2b says:

        Susannah, I don’t think you were out of line at all. Lied-about salt on your food WAS your business!
        Pookie and I just finished hiding 40 plastic eggs filled with money, candy, and toys for two of our grandchildren aged almost 4 and almost 7. The youngest isn’t quite walking yet and will partake in the hunt next year. The oldest two are teenagers and are too cool for egg hunts. Maybe we’ll give them salty eggplant instead, ha ha!

        Liked by 1 person

      • An Easter Egg Hunt. How wonderful is that, and that you and Pookie went to all that trouble. I am all in, as they say in AA. Eggplant is not on the menu I’m happy to say. Happy Hunting to all. 🙂

        Like

  8. equinoxio21 says:

    Without coffee? What did you expect. He’s got a business to run… 🤣

    Liked by 1 person

  9. equinoxio21 says:

    PS. Happy Easter.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.